The Good, the Bad, and the Broken
by revolutionfan20
Summary: Skylar Jones had a simple life before she was picked up by militia. In order to survive training she must push her self to the limit...Despite her fear of losing who she once was along the way...
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1: Oats&BrokenGlass**

The cold water splashed every where. Soaking the two girls and their dresses as the littlest giggled in glee and the other glared down at her sister.  
"Sorry..." she said smiling up at her big sister with adoration. She couldn't help but smile back down at those big blue eyes and she sent a playful splash of water back on the little girl even though she was already soaked. Her little sister squealed and giggled more as they continued to splash each other.  
"Hey" said a deep voice from behind, "I'm pretty sure that's not how you clean dishes"  
"Sorry, dada" the little girl replied, looking down at her toes. The man smiled down at her, coming over he placed a kiss atop both of his daughters heads,  
"Just clean up when you're down" he said giving a stern glance to the eldest girl.  
"We will" she said trying to not to smile as her father glared down at her. After he left the small, bright yellow kitchen the little girl grabbed a dry towel from one of the drawers and tried to wipe up the water on the floor.  
"Sky" the little girl said looking up at her big sister, "When are Derek and Isaac going to be back"  
"They're still hunting, they'll be back in a few days. You know that, Lilly" she replied as she got down on her knees to help her sister.  
"What if they don't come back? What if militia gets em'"  
Her voice was small and scared as she looked hopelessly up at her. Skylar sighed and looked down at her with a tired glance,  
"They'll be fine. They always are, they're smarter than that"  
"But what if they do" she asked again.  
"Lil, I promise it'll be okay"  
She only nodded as they wiped up the rest of the water from the floor then finished cleaning the dishes. When they finished Lilly skipped down the skinny hall to her room, Skylar following more slowly behind, so they could change out of their drenched clothes. She watched her little sisters exceedingly bright blonde curls bounce as she disappeared up the stairs. When she made it to their room Lilly was already pulling a long sleeved white cotton shirt over her head, struggling to fit it through the hole.  
"That's the sleeve silly" Skylar said as she helped fix it so her sisters head popped through the right hole. Lilly just giggled and grabbed a pair of dark green corduroy overalls from the trunk at the end of her bed. Since the blackout, Lilly had to make due with Skylar's hand me downs and being much smaller then her at the age of seven everything was slightly loose on her.  
Nine years ago, when Skylar was only seven, a world wide blackout struck. Leaving everything in darkness. Anything and everything that needed electricity to function even cars, planes and plumbing had went out. Leaving the world in a state of panic, confusion and desperation. Since then, the once United States was split into several nations. The Georgia Federation, The Monroe Republic (to which they resided), The plains Nation, Texas and The California Commonwealth. But then there was also The Wastelands, an unruly, desolate place. As her father put it, _'It's not a place to go wondering. It's dangerous, more dangerous then even General Monroe and Matheson'_...  
Although it was now a fleeting memory, Skylar could recall the days before the darkness. What she remembered most of all was the colorful cartoons that flashed across the screen of their old tv and the taste of rich and creamy ice cream. But Lilly had no memory of any of these things, she only knew of what her older siblings would tell her. Their brothers Derek and Isaac were twins, being only two years older then Skylar's sixteen. Lilly didn't know but she had been a twin too...Her sister and mother both died in child birth, having no real doctor there was nothing their father could do for either of them. Her father doesn't want to tell her, she probably wouldn't understand at least not now...But she does know about their mother, having asked when she was old enough to do so after seeing the pictures of the women all over the house.  
"But I thought you were my mommy?" she had replied with the most innocent expression. Skylar smiled through the tears and ever since she would tell her stories of the amazing women that was their mother. How her laugh, so loud and perfect that it could get even the coldest man to smile and laugh right along with her. How everything about her could make anyone smile and feel that much better. She was like a ray of light in this darkness, something Skylar had always missed most. She was never afraid then, of anything. Without her here, even with her father and brothers to protect them, Skylar was always more on edge, always worried about the littlest things.  
When Lilly had pulled on her boots and ran from the room, her mess of curls flying right behind her, she closed the door to their shared room and started to change. She pulled off the shear, pale blue dress and changed into a pair of dark washed jeans and a black muscle tank. Her father hated it, said that it showed to much from the side and that if any militia soldier or bandit saw it would be like she was asking for it. But he wouldn't argue anymore than that when Skylar rolled her eyes and ignored his comments. She pulled on her own brown leather boots, taking a while to strap up all the laces as there were too many holes to count. To save time she ended up just wrapping the laces around the entire boot then triple knotting the thin string back in front. She braided back her short dirty blonde hair, it only fell just at the shoulders when down but it was for her thankfully long enough to braid. Only leaving a few pieces of hair hanging along the side of her face which she would pushed back behind her ears. Skylar made her way back downstairs and found Lilly was sitting on the red paisley rug in the living room, playing with her dolls and pink teddy. She watched her for a moment, smiling as she pretended to marry the worn doll with the missing eye to the dirt stained bear. Then made her way back through the kitchen and into the mud room, pulling the tan jacket off the hooks along the wall beside the back door she slipped her rather muscular arms through and headed outside. The early winter chill, nipping at her face as she made her way back towards the large red barn. Sliding back the doors and heading towards the back, she grabbed a bucket and filled it with only two scoops of the oats and brought it over to Hugo, the shaggy brown Shire. He poked his head over his stall and when he saw the bucket swinging in the girl's hand his ears perked forward and he shook his head up in down impatiently. Before Skylar could even lift the bucket over the stall door to hang it on it's hook his muzzle was already shoving inside to eat away the treat waiting for him.  
"You are such a pig" she told him as he had already gobbled up the oats.  
"Start rationing it" her fathers voice rang out as he entered the barn, lugging the hand plow with him,  
"We have to be more careful with taxes coming up"  
"I know. I'll turn him out more often" Skylar replied stroking Hugo's muzzle as he searched her with his nose, hoping to find more treats.  
"Do you think Isaac and Derek will catch anything this time?" she asked as she helped him pull the plow into an empty stall.  
"Thanks...I hope so" he answered. He ran his fingers through his dark hair and wiped the sweat from his forehead after closing the stall door behind him and locking it up, "Listen...I'm sorry. I know how much you wanted to go with them"  
"It's all right. I understand" she smiled up at him, trying to show that she was okay with it and she truly was. Someone needed to be there to look after Lilly while he worked to get the harvest ready and she could be a handful even on her best days.  
"Next time. We can make Isaac stay home" he laughed, knowing that Isaac hated watching Lilly ever since she put make up on him when he fell asleep on the couch.  
"I'm sure he'll be thrilled"  
He threw his arm around her shoulder as they walked back to the house. Lilly came running up to them as soon as they stepped inside, she had tears streaming from her eyes as she held a bloody hand up to her sister.  
"Lil! What did you do!" Skylar exclaimed as she knelt in front of her to look over her bloody palm.  
"I dropped the glass of water...I wanted to clean it up myself" she answered through tears and sniffles. Their father sighed and went over to the cabinet above the old washer and dryer as Skylar picked up Lilly and carried her into the kitchen. She set her on top of the kitchen counter near the sink and waited for him to bring the medical supplies.  
"How deep is it?!" he called from the other room. Skylar examined the cut, it was pretty deep,  
"She'll need a few stitches!" she yelled back. He came back into the room, a metal tool box in his hands,  
"We're running low on medicine" he said as he placed the box on the counter next to Lilly. Opening it up, Skylar pulled out a needle and thread for stitching, the tiny green vile of antibiotic and bandages.  
"No!" Lilly screamed when Skylar threaded the needle, "I don't want stitches!"  
"Lilly" she said sternly, "Maybe you shouldn't have played with glass then"  
"I wasn't playing with it!" she said wiping the tears from her eyes with her uninjured hand.  
"It'll be over like that" Papa said, "Here, you can squeeze my hand"  
She wiped her sleeve across her runny nose then took his hand, squeezing it tightly she shut her eyes and braced herself as Skylar cleaned the wound with the antibiotic. She cried in pain as her sister tried her best to quickly stitch up her cut. When she finished Lilly continued to have tears run down her face as they wiped away the blood and wrapped it in a clean bandage.  
"There, that wasn't so bad was it" Skylar said lightly kissing her sister's forehead.  
"Yes it was" she mumbled through tears. Their father cleaned up as Skylar lifted Lilly from the counter and held her tightly in her arms, humming her favorite lullaby as she swayed back and forth across the kitchen and into the living room. She moved over to the couch, still cradling Lilly she sat down on the large, squishy cushions and stroked her sisters hair trying to soothe her as she continued to cry.  
"You're okay, Lil. You're okay" she whispered to her as she still had her arms wrapped tightly around her neck. Lilly's tears subsided as Skylar calmed her down, Lilly looked up with those blue puppy dog eyes and wiped her nose on her sleeve again.  
"It still hurts"  
"I know, it will for only a little while. They it'll be all better and you won't even remember, I promise" Skylar replied.  
"Hey!" a voice yelled from behind making Lilly and Skylar jump from the couch. They turned to see a boy, dirty and lugging a rope with two dead rabbits tied to it over his shoulder,  
"There's my favorite sister!" he smiled as Lilly's face lit up, already forgetting about the pain of her cut as she ran to her brother.  
"Derek!" she shrieked happily as she hugged him, "LOOK! I had to get stitches!"  
She said it proudly with a beaming smile as she threw her hand up so he could see the bandaged cut. Skylar shook her head and rolled her eyes as she was able to get over it so easily.  
"And I only cried a little!" she said as he examined her bandaged hand.  
"That's because you're my tough little nugget" he replied then looked up to Skylar who was trying to stifle a laugh.  
"That bad, huh?" he mouthed to her when seeing her amused stare and she nodded in reply.  
"Where's Isaac?" Lilly asked taking her hand away from Derek as he moved into the kitchen with the dead rabbits.  
"He's putting Sparky and Ginger away" he answered her, talking about their two quarter horses. She followed him into the kitchen, skipping behind him as he brought the rabbits over to father to skin for dinner.  
"That's all we could get before Isaac started complaining" he said as their father shook his head from the scarce game they brought back.  
"Hey now! I was not the one complaining!"  
"ISAAC!" Lilly shrieked even louder and jumped into his arms. He spun her around, then looked down at her bandaged hand,  
"What happened Lil?" he asked looking up at the others with concerned brown eyes.  
"She cut it trying to clean up broken glass" Skylar replied going over to help with the rabbits.  
"You gotta be more careful Lil" Isaac said sternly.  
"I know..." she mumbled.  
"Let them go clean up Lilly" Skylar said as Isaac was putting her down. She gave them both one more hug before bouncing back into the living room to play. Isaac waited till he could no longer see her when he turned to Skylar and his father.  
"We almost had a run in with militia..." he said, sending them to whip their heads away from the rabbits.  
"What?"  
"They were leading away some kids, looked like they were headed towards town" Derek said as he rubbed the dirt from his skin with a wet cloth.  
"Did they see you?" their father asked, more in anger then worry.  
"No, it was too dark and we hid in some bushes before they could"  
"You're both lucky, they would have snatched you up"  
"Who says they won't when they come for taxes?" Isaac argued.  
"Then we'll just have to make sure you aren't home when they come" he replied.  
"We could do something you know" Derek said angrily.  
"Derek don't" Skylar scorned softly.  
"What? What doesn't she want you to say?" their father asked. Skylar glared up at her brother, shaking her head and mouthing 'no' to him but he ignored her.  
"There's rumor about...about a resistance" he said, his voice low as if militia could be listening right outside their door. A long silence fell over the kitchen. Skylar, Isaac and Derek all held their breath as he stopped skinning the rabbit and turned to face them.  
"I know, i've heard" he finally spoke, placing the knife down on the counter gently.  
"I want to join" Derek said firmly and held his father's hard gaze. Skylar and Isaac exchanged glances, Sky bit her lip waiting for their father to explode in anger. But he didn't...he just continued to stand looking at Derek with that all too familiar scolding glare. The one he gave when they fought with each other, or got into trouble or disappointed him in some way...  
"The only thing the resistance will get you is a bed six feet deep"  
"This is something I want to do. Something I have to do! I want to fight back!"  
"Derek" Skylar said firmly, grabbing his jacket sleeve to hush him.  
"No Sky! We can't just stand by and watch Monroe take our crops, our people! Boys my age and years younger are being brain washed and forced to work as slaves for Monroe and his _militia_" he continued to yell, slurring the word 'militia' like it was some gross, despising creature.  
"So what are you going to do? Join the resistance? Leave your family? Leave your sisters who need you here!" their father yelled back.  
"I'm doing it for them! To protect them!" he yelled back, facing his father firmly. Not taking his eyes from him as Lilly walked into the kitchen from hearing all the yelling.  
"Derek," she said, tears in her eyes again, "why are you leaving. I don't want you to go!"  
He only looked away from his father to look down at Lilly as she stood in the wide archway between the kitchen and dining room. He went over to her and got down on his knees so he could look into her eyes.  
"I'm not going anywhere kiddo" he whispered to her and picked her up in his arms.  
"We aren't done with this" their father said as Derek walked away with Lilly in his arms, her face buried in his shirt.  
"Yes...we are" Derek replied without looking back as he walked through the dining room and out of their sight.  
"Finish these damn rabbits" their father said angrily and walked past Isaac.  
"Where are you going?" he asked.  
"Into town" he replied, grabbing his jacket he slammed the back door behind him and headed for the barn to grab one of the horses. Isaac moved next to Skylar to help finish preparing the rabbits for dinner.  
"So what about you?" she asked after they cut off the meat and threw it onto one of the plates.  
"What about me what?  
"Are you going to join too?"  
"I want too...But I won't"  
"Because of Dad?"  
"No, because of you and Lilly" he said softly, looking down at her. She just nodded as they brought the meat outside. They skewered the rabbit meat and cooked it over a fire. They did it in silence as Skylar contemplated what would happen if her brothers went off to fight in the rebellion...and Isaac contemplated what would happen if he didn't...While Derek and Isaac were twins, they didn't look exactly alike. It was called being 'fraternal' twins their father said. They both had the same dirty blonde hair, not as bright and blonde as Lilly's but not nearly as brunette as Skylar's either. Derek had blue eyes and was a lot taller, which he argued was from being the eldest (even though he was only older then Isaac by a few minutes). Isaac had those piercing dark brown eyes and despite being shorter, he was a lot more muscular than Derek. Derek also had a thick stubble since he hated to shave while Isaac was always had a clean cut look. When they finished cooking the rabbit they brought it inside and set the small dining table.  
"Should we wait for dad?" Skylar asked.  
"No, he'll be back too late" Derek answered as he and Lilly joined them. Skylar grabbed a little bread and cheese and they sat down to eat, once again in silence. Lilly looked back and forth in between the three of them, still worried from the fighting earlier and now their father having left in a hurry into town.  
"What's the resistance?" she suddenly asked. Skylar glared at Derek and he ignored her gaze as he turned to Lilly to answer.  
"It doesn't matter. But Lil, you can't ever mention it again. _Ever_. Not to anyone, all right?"  
"All right"  
"Are you sure you understand? It's very important Lillian Martha Jones " he said, he only ever used her full name when he was being stern with her.  
"Yes! I understand" she exclaimed as she waved her fork at him. When they finished eating, Lilly helped Skylar clean up as Isaac and Derek went to finish cleaning the dirt from themselves and change clothes. As they set the dishes into the sink to leave to wash tomorrow, the sun was setting and it grew dark inside the house forcing Skylar to light the candles and lanterns. She looked down at Lilly as she dragged her feet across the kitchen floor and rubbed her drooping eyes.  
"All right it's time for bed"  
"But i'm not even tired" she said with a large yawn.  
"I beg to differ" she smiled as she took Lilly's hand and led her back up to their room. She helped her change into her white night gown as she just barely forced her arms over her head, heaving out another long yawn.  
"Will you sing me Hush-A-Bye Mountain?" she asked as Skylar tucked her underneath her pink striped comforter.  
"Of course" she smiled, handing Lilly the pink teddy bear she loved so much.  
She began to sing in a soft whisper as she stroked back Lilly's thin blonde curls;  
"_The winds of the night, so softly are sighing.  
Soon they will fly your troubles to sea.  
So close your eyes on hush-a-bye mountain.  
And wave goodbye to cares of the day.  
Watch your boat from hush-a-bye mountain.  
Sail far away, from lullaby bay_"  
Lilly drifted off before she even finished the song, Skylar kissed her cheek before quietly leaving the room and shutting the door behind her. She made her way down the hall, passing the open door of the bathroom she caught of glimpse of her brother. She doubled back and knocked on the door frame,  
"Can I come in?" she asked quietly.  
"Of course" Derek replied as he brought the razor over his cheek.  
"Are you really going to leave?" she asked, sitting on top of the long counter as he continued to shave.  
"I don't know" he replied, slightly glancing at her before splashing cold water on his face. He rubbed his smooth skin, looking over his work in the mirror.  
"I didn't mean to yell at you before" he said.  
"It's okay. I just don't want you to go. It was hard enough when mom died. I don't want to know what would happen to us if you died too"  
"I just can't sit around anymore. I can't watch them continue to hurt people. It's killing me Sky"  
He turned around and pushed himself up on the counter and sat next to her, being careful not to fall back into the sink as he did. She leaned her head against his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around her.  
"Hey," he said squeezing her arm gently, "It'll be okay"  
"You don't know that" she replied.  
"Yes I do"  
"How could you possibly know?"  
"Because I know everything" he smirked. She smiled up at him and he kissed the top of her head before jumping down,  
"Come on, you look tired you should get some sleep" he told her as they walked out of the bathroom.  
"Wake me when dad gets back?" she asked as they walked to her room.  
"I don't know if I want to be awake for that myself" he whispered.  
"Just please try and understand what you're putting him through with this" she answered with pleading blue eyes.  
"Fine. Fishing tomorrow?"  
"Sure" she replied with a smile and quietly opened the door to her room. She changed into pajamas and tip toed over to the bed adjacent from Lilly's. She crawled under the blankets and turned out the small flame in the lantern on the bedside table between her and Lilly.  
She fell asleep quickly, dreaming of a red, white and blue flag flying in the sky.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Fish&BrokenWords**

"Nothins' biting!" Skylar called down to Derek who was just a few yards down the waters edge from her.  
"Give it some more time, you're too impatient!"  
She sat at the edge of the large pond, using the rocks as her chair as she sat (rather impatiently) with pole in hand. Derek had already caught three fish, and she had none. It was early in the morning, just after dawn. She was dressed in her snug dark washed jeans, a blue and white striped thin cotton sweater and her favorite tan jacket. She rested her cheek against her fist as she did as Derek said and tried to wait patiently for something to bite.  
"Dad never came home last night, he wasn't in his bed this morning and it was still made" Skylar said after a while.  
"I'm sure he lost track of time and decided to stay at John's. You know how dangerous it can get after dark" he answered, reeling in yet another fish,  
"I'm sure he'll be back when we get home"  
"Yeah...Right..." she said, still worried that something had happened to him.  
"I'm still not having any luck"  
"Maybe it's because you keep talking!" he mocked, coming over to her with his load, "they can hear you know. Too much sound scares them away"  
She stuck her tongue out at him and reeled in her fish-less line. They walked back the three short miles to their small farm house. Coming out of the woods and walking up the hill they were greeted by the bouncy seven year old as she ran from the porch steps to greet them, a long haired german shepherd running behind. It barked and bounced along side her as they made their way down the hill to Derek and Skylar.  
"Did you catch anything?!" Lilly asked coming to a stumbling halt in front of them. She threw her hand on the dog's back to catch herself as it looked up at her with big brown eyes and it's tongue hanging out the side of it's mouth.  
"Yep kid, making your favorite for dinner tonight" Derek said smiling as he held up his catches. She smiled brightly up at them and then pulled on the dogs collar,  
"Com' on Cass!" she said as they ran back up towards the house, Cass barking and playfully nipping at her heels as they went.  
"I'm going into town later for medical supplies. Do we need anything else?" Skylar asked Derek as they walked up the porch steps and into the house.  
"We need more grain for the horses. Maybe go by O'Leary's on the way back? He's always stocked up. But don't let the old bastard trick you into paying more than it's worth"  
"I'll take Hugo then" she said as they threw the fish onto the kitchen counter near the sink.  
"Dad's still not back yet" Isaac said coming in from the back door, "I looked everywhere"  
"He's probably with Kara" Derek commented snidely as he gutted and beheaded a fish a little too forcefully.  
"Don't start on that" Skylar said sternly, "What if Lilly heard you?"  
"I'm sure she'd be happy to have a new mommy"  
"Derek please"  
"Sorry" he said softly, seeing her hurt expression.  
"He's trying, okay. Why can't you?"  
"I'm going to head into Hudson now. Keep an eye on Lilly please" she said when he didn't answer.  
"Yeah of course" he replied and waved her off without looking up from the fish. She looked at him hopelessly for a moment before grabbing the crossbow by the back door and heading to the barn. She threw the pack saddle on to Hugo then led him out of his stall. She rode the eight miles into town, as soon as she rode in she jumped from Hugo's back and led him through the market lined streets. Neighbors she knew waved to her as she passed and she waved back to them with a smile.  
"Skylar!" a women's voice called, she turned to see a woman with dark black hair and stunning green eyes running up to her. Her dark hair was as straight and as perfect as she was. Her smile was wide and genuine as she came over to Skylar and the large horse.  
"Kara" Skylar exclaimed, trying to hold back the tone of annoyance.  
"You just missed your father. He left about fifteen minutes ago" she said giving Hugo a pat on his back.  
"So he's okay? We were worried when he didn't come back last night"  
"Yes he was quite upset...He stayed the night" she answered almost hesitantly.  
"Right" Skylar huffed.  
"He's worried about you kids"  
"Well he shouldn't. Except for Lilly we aren't _kids_ anymore"  
"He knows that. That's what scares him"  
"Do you need something" Skylar asked coldly. She could see Kara was taken aback by her harsh tone but she ignored it,  
"I was just going to see if you needed any help"  
"No...But thank you"  
Skylar gave her a small smile before continuing towards the old Auto body shop. The thick, rusty metal garage door was open, and she could see the burly man as he lugged a large sack across the floor and threw it atop one of the long tables that lined inside the garage.  
"Ah, Ms. Jones, what can I do for ya?" O'Leary said as he looked up to see Skylar tying down Hugo just outside the shop.  
"Need some feed for the horses"  
"I don't think i'll be able to spare much with taxes coming today...It'll cost you"  
"Oh come on Pops, you don't want to scare her away"  
Skylar turned to see Chris O'Leary; while his last name was O'Leary he was not O'Leary's son.

He was an orphan O'Leary's wife had taken in when he was thirteen before she died a year later. He was a few years older then Skylar, he had on a flirtatious smile as he looked her over. He also didn't have a shirt on, covered in sweat and dirt from god knows whatever work he was doing. He blatantly flexed his muscles slightly as he drew closer to Skylar. She rolled her eyes at him, "I don't need your help"  
"Why can't you two get along?" O'Leary shouted as he grabbed another large sack from the rolling cart.  
"I do Pops. She's the one who's always putting me down" he said faking a disappointed expression. He took her hands and ran his fingers over her palm softly.  
"You have to know by now that the flirting isn't working on me" Skylar whispered.  
"Did you go to the lake? Your hands smell like fish"  
"You're rather abrupt this morning"  
"I like the smell" he said, flashing his teeth in a bright smile. She laughed and pulled her hands away,  
"Is that the best you can do? That's weak Chris"  
"So what do you want for a sack of feed?" she said turning to O'Leary as he threw the last sack on the table.  
"That plow of yours is pretty nice"  
"You know I can't trade that"  
"All right. I can give you half a sack for that pack saddle you got there" he said pointing to Hugo.  
"Two sacks. You can get a lot from that saddle, i'm not stupid O'Leary"  
"Deal"  
Skylar went over to Hugo and unstrapped the saddle from his back. She brought it over to O'Leary who took it from her as she moved to grab her two sacks of feed.  
"How are you going to get those back without a pack saddle?" Chris asked moving between her and the table just as she was about to grab a sack of feed.  
"I'll manage"  
"I'll help you bring it back" he said smiling down at her.  
"If this is another attempt to get in my pants O'Leary you have another thing coming" she exclaimed, pushing him out of her way and throwing a sack of feed over her shoulder. Having worked with her father on their farm all her life she had become a lot stronger than anyone would give her credit for. Chris grabbed the second sack and carried it over to Hugo for her.  
"We have a cart" he said throwing it down on the ground as Skylar looked over Hugo and contemplated how she was going to tie them down.  
"What exactly is in it for you?" she said turning to the boy with the light brown hair and pale blue eyes.  
"Meet me at the lake tonight?"  
"You've got to be joking" she scoffed, "I know you O'Leary, better than most. I know what happens when you bring a girl down to the lake"  
"And what happens?" he smirked.  
"Girls lose their clothes...and their self respect"  
"You're different"  
"I'm sure that's your signature line"  
"Only with the _really_ pretty ones"  
"You're relentless"  
"Then say yes"  
"Okay...but i'm not going skinny dipping with you"  
"I didn't expect anything" he replied, his smile growing wider.  
"Of course you didn't" she laughed.  
Chris brought over the cart and to Skylar's own surprise in her disappoint, he had put his shirt back on. But left the few buttons that ran down the front of the white cotton shirt undone. They tethered Hugo to the small cart and threw the two sacks of feed inside. As they walked back through town together, Skylar stopped at several stands and stocked up on medicinal herbs, she payed with what little money she had and then she and Chris headed away from town. They walked back to her farm mostly in silence, every once and a while she stole a glance up at him to which he returned when she wasn't looking. Chris led Hugo into the barn as Skylar slid back the doors, he helped her stow away the feed and put Hugo away before heading back out.  
"What about your cart?" she asked as she carried the medicine into the house.  
"You can bring it back next time you're in town" he replied as he helped her put the medicine into the cabinets of the mud room.  
"Thank you"  
"I'll see you tonight" he smiled down at her and left through the back door. She hid a smile as she turned to walk into the kitchen and ran right into Derek.  
"What did he mean by _'i'll see you tonight'_?" Derek said looking down at her with a stern gaze.  
"Nothing" she replied, avoiding his eyes as she brushed past.  
"It's obviously not nothing"  
"It's none of your business"  
"He's bad news Sky. Whatever you're planning with him, don't do it"  
"I don't know what you're talking about"  
"Chris is my friend. I've known him all my life._ I know him_, I know the things he gets into"  
"I don't like him that way Derek. It's not like that with us, we just joke around. Nothing like that is going to happen between us"  
"So there is something going on with you and him"  
"Why do you care? You're leaving anyway, right?" she sneered back at him and stormed off into the living room. Cass and Lilly greeted her by knocking her to the floor. Lilly's giggles were enough to make her smile, she lifted her sister into her arms and spun her around as Cass continued to bounce trying to lick Lilly's face.  
"What were you and Derek fighting about?" Lilly asked as they fell back onto the couch.  
"About who's your favorite sibling" Skylar smiled down at her.  
"That's silly" she replied giggling.  
"Yeah I guess it is..."  
That night at dinner, they sat around the table in silence. Their father, Kyle Jones, watched his children intently. He glanced from one child to the next, studying their emotionless faces, well except for Lilly who was supporting the wide smile she always wears.

He looked to his sons. He didn't know what he would do without them. Since Marion had died they had stepped up to help with the girls, going above and beyond, especially the days where he couldn't bring himself to leave the house or even get out of bed.

Then he looked to his two beautiful daughters. They looked so much like their mother that it made him more happy then sad; they were the little pieces of her that she so lovingly left behind. They were as strong and as caring as her and Kyle knew that they would have made her proud.

They all would have. His children were everything to him, they are all he has in this dark world and he couldn't imagine losing them too.  
"Is there any particular reason to the silence that we are enjoying with dinner" Kyle asked his children. Skylar and Derek glanced at each other with out even the slightest hesitation. Their father noticed the estranged looks they threw each other and it didn't take a genius to know there was something they were keeping from him.  
"Sky and Derek were fighting over who I think is the best!" Lilly exclaimed, clearly pleased that (from what she believed) it had something to do with her. Skylar's fork stumbled from her hand, sending it clanging onto her plate as everyone turned to look at her.  
"Sorry..." she mumbled. She caught Derek's eye again, but turned away when his face turned to a hard glare.  
"May I be excused" she said, looking to her father. Kyle hesitated slightly before nodding and she stood, taking her plate to the kitchen and then running out the back door to take the horses in from the paddock. She grabbed Hugo last and as she was locking his stall, Isaac came in through the barn doors and right to her.  
"What" she snarled when he didn't say anything but stare at her with a worried look.  
"He still sees you as his kid sister and so do I sometimes. So when he finds out that you're running off with Chris O'Leary in the middle of the night what did you expect him to think?"  
"I'm not running off with him" she replied, irritated with both of them now.  
"Then what do you call it?"  
"Going to see a friend. Is that such a bad thing?"  
"I wasn't under the impression that you were friends with him"  
"Well, you're hearing it from me; I am" she said turning to face him, but leaning up against the stall door.  
"I'm sixteen...Almost seventeen...I can handle myself and I can handle Chris O'Leary" she said as Hugo stuck his head over the stall door and butted it against her. She put an arm around his neck and ran her fingers through his thick, shaggy mane.  
"It's not fair" she continued, "He's worried about me going off with some boy, yet I have to sit and watch him go off and join a war!"  
"It's something he feels he has to do. It's important to him" Isaac replied, "I understand his reasoning"  
"Does that mean you're going too?" she asked softly, feeling tears building in her eyes.  
"No...As important as it is, I just don't think I could leave here"  
Skylar only nodded as she continued to untangle Hugo's mane. They stood in silence for a while before Isaac came to stand closer to her.  
"If you do still go or Derek doesn't try to stop you, just promise me you'll be careful?"  
She gave a slight nod, as he leaned in and kissed the top of her head, then hugged her before heading back up to the house...

Everything was normal that night; Skylar tucked Lilly into bed and sang her the lullaby, she did a last check on the horses and cleaned the kitchen. Her father went to bed early, and looking into his room he had already fallen asleep the second his body had hit the mattress. She quietly made her way upstairs and into her room. Being careful not to wake Lilly she changed into shorts and a cropped blue tank. She threw her boots back on and headed down to the kitchen. It was dark, having blown out all the candles and turning out the flames of the lanterns. She had expected Derek to be waiting in the living room or at least the mud room to stop her but he wasn't. It made her more nervous then relieved to find him not there. But she didn't want to take the chance that he was just in his room and would come down any second to run after her. She headed quickly but quietly out the back door and raced down to the lake. Since she had lived there all her life it wasn't hard to find it in the dark. Once she got there, she could already see Chris sitting in front of a large fire. As soon as she got close he turned from hearing her making her way towards him. He grabbed his cross bow, standing up he pointed it her way but put it back down when he saw it was just her.  
"Wow" was all he exclaimed with a satisfying smile on his face.  
"Wow what?" she asked as she came to stand in front of him.  
"I didn't think you were actually going to show" he replied.  
"I told you I would" she remarked, finding herself smiling back at him, "So are we going swimming or not?"  
Before he could answer she was already stripping down to her bra, but leaving her shorts on and running towards the old wooden dock. He stripped to his boxers and followed right behind, as she was already jumping off the edge and diving into the ice cold water.  
"Jesus!" she exclaimed after rising to the surface, Chris's head popped up right after her own. She could just make out his laugh and the smile spread across his face, the cold water clearly not bothering him.  
"Can't take the cold, Jonesie?" he smirked.  
"That's what I have you for" she replied, surprising herself as she said it and treaded closer to him. Their legs brushing against each other as they kept themselves afloat and she leaned in. Skylar hesitated only slightly before letting her nose brush against his and kissed him swiftly.

"And here I was thinking you didn't like me that way, Skylar Jones" he whispered when she pulled her lips away.  
"Maybe I changed my mind" she whispered back.  
"What would your father do to me if he knew we were messing around down here?" he commented, his lips still close enough for her to feel the warmth of his breath mingle in hers.  
"Probably ring your neck and my brothers would help"  
"Then I guess it goes without saying that what they don't know can't hurt us right?" he smirked wildly.  
"My thoughts exactly" she replied and leaned in to kiss him again, this time only pulling away so they could move closer to shore and make out without worrying about drowning as they did. He took her hand and walked her back to the fire, she sat as close as she could get without burning her toes off. Luckily he had been smart and brought a blanket. He wrapped it around her after she had thrown her shirt back on and he had pulled on his pants. He sat down next to her, close enough that all he had to do was turn his head to kiss her. His hand moved slowly across her stomach and then gripped her waist as their lips met again. She moved the blanket so it wrapped around the both of them and moved as close as she could get without pulling their lips apart.  
Five minutes...ten...fifteen...  
She wasn't quite sure how long they sat with their lips molded together, their hands moving all over each other. But what surprised her wasn't that she let him, but that he was the one who pulled away first.  
"What made you change your mind?" he asked, his hand now stroking her cheek as he looked down at her.  
"I don't know...Why do you care?"  
"I know what you think of me" he darted his eyes down her body then brought them back up to meet hers,

"You always made it perfectly clear and I have to say I honestly didn't expect anything from this. But of course to my surprise you kissed me"  
"You didn't seem so surprised" was her reply.  
"i'm good at hiding what I really feel"  
"And what do you really feel" she asked looking up at him with scrutinizing blue eyes.  
"Nothing"  
He pushed the blanket off of him and let it fall back around her. He grabbed his white cotton shirt and pulled it over his head, slowly slipping his arms back through it and inching away from her. He grabbed a stick and poked the fire,  
"We need more wood" he said then got up and headed in the woods. Skylar sat in a sort of shock, watching him as he walked away from her. She expected him to flirt and attempt to feel her up. She expected him to try and kiss her, not let her make the first move. But what she certainly did not expect was Chris O'Leary, the boy with the exuberant confidence to become flustered and walk away to _'gather firewood_' for a fire that was still blazing high. She waited for him to come back and when he did, not even thirty seconds later, his hands were empty as he sat back down next to her. She looked up at him with confused glare,  
"What?" he asked.  
"Nothing" she mumbled and pulled the blanket around her tighter.  
Skylar woke upon the grassy shore of the lake. The fire had died down, nothing but dark embers of the charred wood. She looked over and saw Chris still asleep, his arm behind his head and the other over his stomach. It was light outside, but the sun was not yet peaking through the pine trees. Just barely dawn and chilly, a fog spreading over the small lake. She pulled on her boots and rubbed her tired eyes.

Her father was going to kill her if Derek didn't beat him to it.  
"Chris" she said going over and shaking him awake. His eyes opened and he pushed himself up slightly,  
"We fell asleep..." his voice muttered hoarsely.  
"Come on" she rolled her eyes and pulled him up into a sit. He tiredly threw on his boots and grabbed his crossbow as they walked slowly away from the lake.  
"You don't have to walk me back" she said when he continued to walk beside her for awhile.  
"I want to" he replied.  
"It's probably best if you don't" she said stopping in her tracks. He looked back at her, almost hurt but then quickly wiped any sign of it from his face.  
"Are you sure"  
"No..."  
His gaze suddenly moved away from Skylar and back behind her, she heard the men and the hooves of the horses before she even turned around. She felt Chris's hand move firmly over her arm as he pulled her behind him. She looked upon the approaching militia soldiers with a mix of fear and anger, both of which she tried her best to hide.  
"Hold!" called a man atop a tall bay horse, throwing his hand in the air to signal the soldiers and wagon behind him to come to a halt as they came up to Chris and Skylar.  
"Good morning" the man said with a deceiving smile, "May I ask where you two are from?"  
"Hudson" Chris said firmly, not bothering to hide the hate in his tone as he spoke.  
"A few miles that way" Skylar answered, her voice trembling slightly as she looked up at the dark skinned man. Small, black round glasses covered his face and he dismounted his horse, handing the reins off to a soldier as he walked towards them.  
"We just collected taxes from Hudson not twenty minutes ago. Tell me boy, what family do you come from in Hudson"  
"I have a father...name's O'Leary"  
"Yes, the chubby man who lives in the old Auto shop"  
"Yes that's the one" Chris replied.  
"Funny...I could have sworn that O'Leary didn't have a son. I've known him quite a while"  
Panic showed in Skylar's face, knowing already exactly where this was going, but Chris stood tall and his voice stayed firm.  
"Then you must be thinking of another O'Leary" he remarked.  
"Cute" was all the militia officer replied before nodding to some soldiers. They came up and grabbed Chris, who fought violently against their grip.  
"No!" Skylar yelled, trying to pry the soldiers hands from him. Chris was able to pull his own arm from one of their grips and he swung, punching the militia soldier in the face. But more just came and grabbed him and pushed him to the ground. Before they could restrain Chris completely, he pulled a knife from his boot and stabbed one, sending the hunting knife right into his throat. The soldier flailed on the ground, scratching at the knife before bleeding out. A shot rang out, making Skylar jump. When she was able to catch herself she saw Chris lying on the ground, blood spilling from his chest. She ran to kneel beside his body, throwing her hands over the wound as she sobbed uncontrollably.  
"Chris!"  
His hand moved over hers for only a moment before it fell back to the ground and his body went still, his eyes turned up to the sky...  
"NO!" she screamed caressing his face in her hands, hoping his eyes would look up at her and he would smile one last time. She looked up at the militia officer, he was slipping his gun back into his holster, glaring down at her almost in satisfaction.  
"And what would your name be" he asked her.  
She didn't answer.  
She looked up at the man with the most despised, disgusted look she could throw him as tears were still falling from her eyes. He nodded to a soldier she couldn't see and she fell forward as the contact of a boot hit her hard on the back.  
"What is your name" he asked again.  
"Skylar...Skylar Jones" she choked out, her voice breaking sharply as she continued to cry.  
"Well Ms. Jones. How would you like to join the militia?" he asked with a wide smirk.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Shackles&BrokenFaces**

Skylar Jones sat limply in the back of the wagon. Her wrists rubbed raw from the cuffs pushing against her skin. Any strength she had before, she felt had left her as she could barely turn her head to peer up at the clouded sky. But she felt the cold drops of rain fall on her face as the wagon continued to move onward despite the threat of the oncoming storm. The image of Chris lying bloody on the ground was still horridly fresh in her mind. She felt the eyes of the boy next to her; she forced herself to turn and look at the chubby fourteen year old. His cheeks red and plump, his eyes darted away when she stared coldly back at him. His blonde hair was dirty and she could see leaves stuck in it from when they had to tackle him to the ground and pull him back towards the wagon when he tried to run. Which of course he didn't get very far due to his...physique.  
They were somewhere along the shoreline of Massachusetts, that's all she knew.

That's all they would tell her.  
Far from Hudson. Far from her home. And Far from her family...  
The only thing of value she learned was the officers name;  
Captain Tom Neville.  
_The second I get out of these cuffs_...She thought to herself..._I'm going to break his nose_...  
She knew that if she even ever got the chance to get that close that's all she would be able to get out before they most likely would restrain her, beat her or even not bother and shoot her like Neville had Chris. While Skylar didn't know where she was she knew where they were going; A militia training camp.  
Where they would beat, brain wash and build soldiers out of teenagers and sometimes even younger if they appeared old enough.  
They rode for days. The rain, the cold, nothing was stopping Captain Neville and his men from getting to their destination. They barely fed her and the boy, and what they did give them Skylar pushed aside as it was usually stale or moldy and she would not let herself accept anything from them no matter how hungry she was. By the time they arrived at the camp, she was weak, tired, and sick. She thought that they would kill her, or let her go because she would now be no use as a soldier but they didn't as they removed the chains of her cuffs from the bar on the wagon and pulled her towards the camp. It was an old prison; large wired fences surrounded the entirety of the small of it, at least three feet thick barbed wire lining the top. They pushed Skylar and the chubby boy through the heavily guarded gate and down a long path towards the building. There were barely any windows and what windows there were, were extremely skinny and blocked with bars. There was the same fence on each side of the path, blocking the open fields of a training yard from the only entrance/exit. There were mostly boys, and occasionally Skylar spotted a girl, parading around the open prison yard. As soon as they saw the wagon pull up, and spotted Skylar and the boy they ran to the fences. They yelled, and laughed and mocked as the militia soldiers continued to walk them down the path towards the prison. They were all wearing the same navy blue militia uniforms and black boots. Skylar tried to avoid looking at their faces as she heard whistles and jeers that were directed at her. She felt relieved when they disappeared behind the prison's door and she could no longer see or hear the other prisoners. They pushed her and the boy into a room full of other teens, about fifteen to twenty boys and all changing into blue militia uniforms. Once they all finished changing, the militia guards lined them up into four rows randomly. A man walked in, he was wearing the same blue uniform only he was also wearing the signature green jacket that the militia officers sometimes wore. He was maybe in his thirties, short brown hair but it was too dark in the room to hard to tell anything else as he stepped in front of us...  
"My name is Lt. Johnson and I want to welcome you. I know that some of you are scared right now but let me tell you that this is going to be the very best thing that has ever happened to you. You get the chance to fight and die for something that truly matters. General Monroe has led us away from the filth and corruption of The United States. He's given us strength and morality and the Monroe Republic will be the greatest nation that this world has ever seen"  
He looks around the room for the moment, trying to study the faces of the 'fresh meat' before him. Skylar was in the back row, and something brought his attention upon her and she could only guess that it was because she was the only girl in the room. But then he suddenly turned to the boy beside her and signaled to him,  
"You all right there son? Step out. Come on" he said trying to coax the boy to the front, "Go on. You can speak freely"  
"I...I just..." the boy looked nervously around at everyone else, "I just want to go home"  
His voice was soft and hesitant, he was seemed about the same age as Skylar. He was just as tall as her five foot five and he shifted nervously as he looked back at Lt. Johnson.  
"All right" the Lt. smiled and nodded to the door, "Go on, you're free to leave. Anyone can! Go on, really"  
The boy hesitated before slowly walking towards the door, everyone stayed frozen as he reached his hand towards the handle. As he did, Lt. Johnson whipped something from his hand, hitting the boy down to the floor and beating him. He cried in pain then went silently as blood started to gush from his bashed in face and skull.  
"Anyone else want to go home?" he asked still smiling, "No? Good"  
They led them down the hallways of the prison. The large crowd that had been outside in the training yard had been brought to there cells already, Skylar having recognized one or two faces as they passed by.

They had been brought in while Lt. Johnson was talking with the newbies as they called them. They made the newbies stand single file as they handed them a spare uniform and directed them one by one to a cell. Putting four in an empty one, or two if they were already occupied. Skylar and the chubby boy were last, sending them to the cell at the far end of the prison which was already occupied by two other boys who were older, and much bigger then the chubby boy and Skylar combined. The cell was small, only containing two sets of bunks, one on each side as they were bolted to the walls. The militia guards violently shoved Skylar inside when she froze in front of the open cell door. The two boys who already occupied the cell looked up from their bunks, they had been lying down before and now were in full attention when seeing Skylar. The one on the top bunk smirked viciously while the other just blankly stared back at her.  
"Carter, Roland, meet your new cell mates" said the guard then slammed the cell door closed, locked it and walked away. Skylar could hear the door at the end of the hall open then slam shut as the guard left their cell block. When he did, the smirking boy on the top bunk jumped down and walked towards her. The chubby one she had come with moved out of his way, taking the bottom bunk that was free.  
"I'm Roland. What's your name sweetheart?"  
She didn't answer, she tried to back away from him but he only continued to move closer. Being locked in the tiny cell it would obviously be impossible to get away from him, but she kept trying before accidentally backing into the metal frame of the bunk beds. Roland moved so that he stood right in front of her, putting his hand against the top bunk so that it was close to her face as he leaned in.  
"We don't get a lot of girls around here...This will be fun" he said and tried to put his hand over her cheek. But she saw it coming and sent her clenched fist right up into his nose. The blow sent him tumbling back against the metal cell bars,  
"You bitch!" he yelled, holding his hand over his now bleeding nose. She smiled which just made him angrier and he came at her. Before she could throw another punch he got grabbed from behind and was pushed up against the cell as the other boy, Carter, put his hand around his neck and squeezed.  
"Don't" was all Carter said as he let a terrified Roland fall to the floor. Then turning away from Roland, Carter moved back to his bunk and laid down with out even looking at Skylar. The chubby boy only sat back on his bunk, just as terrified as Roland. Carter knew Skylar's eyes were on him, but he ignored her. Soon enough Roland climbed back onto his bunk and Skylar to hers. She turned her back to them, knowing that by the look on Roland's face he wasn't going to try anything with Carter around...She silently cried herself to sleep, the first time being able to really rest in days despite the thin, uncomfortable bunk mattress...  
The sounds of militia guards yelling and running their guns against the bars of the metal cells woke Skylar and her cell mates. She could tell it was morning, the thin window in their cell now letting in the sun light as it started to rise. She jumped from the top bunk and stood beside the chubby boy who looked up at her,  
"I'm Jamie, by the way" he said with a small smile, large dimples popping out of his round cheeks.  
"Skylar" she practically whispered in reply and unable to return the gesture of a smile, but he didn't seem offended by it as he turned away from her now smiling to himself. She caught Carter's eye and held his gaze for a second. He didn't smile, but he didn't look angry anymore either...He just looked back into her eyes, his face unreadable then he looked away as armed soldiers came to their cell.  
"You three come with me" one of them said, "No not you chubs. You stay here"  
Skylar looked to Jamie and he just shrugged and went back to his bunk. As they led them down the hall, she saw a wide smirk spread across Roland's face, making her uneasy. As they passed the other cells she noticed they were still mostly filled with the same boys from the other night, the newbies. Then she realized she was the only one from last nights small group being led out and into the open yard she had seen yesterday. They pushed Roland and Carter out the door first but stopped her.  
"Hello Ms. Jones," said Lt. Johnson, "Captain Neville told us to give you extra special treatment so don't have too much fun out there"  
Then he shoved her through the door and into bright sunlight. When her eyes adjusted all she could see was the large field and probably what seemed like the largest in muscle and the oldest of the boys here...and no guards.  
When they saw her, it was like hungry wolves catching scent of prey. At first they stared at her strangely, then most of them started to advance towards her slowly...There wasn't many of them, maybe eight or ten. She didn't count as she was too focused on the fact that Roland was coming at her and him being the closest she was more worried about the revenge driven look in his eye. He slammed her back against the metal door, putting his hands around her neck and choking her. Instead of trying to pry his hands away she sent her fist slamming across his face again and it only took one as he slightly stumbled back. But he gathered himself quickly and came at her again. Instead of attacking her all at once, the boys surrounded Skylar, giving her no escape and not that it would matter with the thirty foot, barbed wire fence...They cheered on Roland and patiently waited for their turn with her...

She knew there was no way she would get out of here alive. With more of them, she would tire quickly. So she decided to put all her strength into Roland. She took a punch to the face from him but it only whipped her head slightly as she had braced herself. She felt the blood trickle down her lip as she sent one right back into his throat, causing him to gag and heave as he became winded.  
"Come on Roland!" the other boys shouted. As he was collecting himself, Skylar could see the boy Carter behind the half circle of boys...just standing there.

Watching silently...  
Roland came at her again and she directed his fist away with her arm and slammed her other fist into his gut.  
"OHH!" the other boys yelled as Roland fell back, gripping his stomach. But they only laughed for a moment before cheering him on again.  
Skylar hadn't eaten in days...and barely slept. She was already starting to feel weak as Roland came at her again this time, shoving her to the ground as he used all his strength to ram his body into hers. She rammed her knee into his gut a few times after he threw several punches at her face, hitting her across the cheek and the eye this time. As he grimaced slightly from the jabs with her knee she sent it up again this time kneeing him between the legs, then slamming her head into his and knocking him back. He fell over in immense pain, not getting up despite his personal cheerleaders. Skylar slowly pushed herself onto her feet as Roland got dragged away and another boy came forward. Skylar had grown up with two older brothers, while nothing had ever come close to this violent, wrestling with Derek and Isaac had made her smart when it came to fighting and her strength she had got from growing up on the farm.  
The boy...more like man...that stood in front of her now, wore the same wicked smile Roland had...and he was much bigger than Roland. His hair was shaved into a buzz cut, yet bright blonde against his bronzed skin. He unbuttoned his blue, long sleeved militia shirt, revealing biceps and abs thick in muscle. It was not so much attractive as scary to look at. She could see a large burn mark on his wrist as he clenched his fists, it was the militia emblem and there was no doubt in her mind that she would get one too...She spit the blood pooling in her mouth on the ground in front of him. He almost slightly hesitated before moving towards her. She took a deep breath, knowing that the first punch from him would probably knock her out cold. That's when Carter stepped in, his back to her as he faced the boy who was even bigger than him. Despite his size advantage the boy was taken aback by Carter's sudden presence...and his face suddenly went white in fear and he stepped back, away from Skylar and Carter...  
No one else moved forward.  
They were no longer Cheering.  
It was completely silent...  
BANG!  
A shot rang out from above, making them all duck and cover their heads in fear. Skylar turned, looking up to see that just perched on the roof of the prison was a militia guard armed with a sniper rifle. Skylar whipped her head back around, expecting the soldier to have shot Carter for standing with her...but there he was still standing, now looking at the large, muscular boy who had just backed away from him...A small hole between his eyes and blood running out and over his face...  
Skylar looked on in horror...her face white, and the sick feeling crawling back over her.  
"I think that's enough for today" Lt. Johnson exclaimed from the now open door. Militia soldiers came and carried away the boys body. Then came back and practically dragged Roland away and to the infirmary. But they didn't take Skylar, instead they kept her and the others out in the prison yard. Guards now started to appear around the perimeter and more now above on the roof, all carrying heavy fire power. She looked to Carter, seeing him better now he wasn't that much taller than she was. His hair was cropped short and messy as he probably didn't own a comb. His eyes were a deep blue like hers and his face despite probably having been here for a while was only slightly covered in the same light brown stubble. The sleeves of his shirt were rolled to his elbows and she could see the militia emblem burned into his skin, but his forearms were also covered in other thick scars. As much as everything about him should have scared her she wasn't afraid, more intrigued on how he could have installed so much fear into them and of course why he was helping her. He looked right back at her; her hair now flying in messy strands from out of her braid, dirt and blood coated her face, knuckles and her lips dry, cracked and just as bloody.  
She was no longer the pretty farm girl that had once left even Chris O'Leary tongue tied and silent.  
She was going to turn into a killer...  
She was already turning into a soldier...  
She was turning into militia.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Fire&BrokenSilence**

Everyday it happened.  
All the newbies were put in the yard, one by one. They wanted to see what they were made of; if they could hack it as a soldier or be more valuable taking bullets on the front lines. Jamie never came back...from what the boy, Jimmy, in the cell across from Skylar said was that someone had rammed his head against the prison wall and he bled out. But the boy sharing his cell said Jimmy was a pathological lier...But still, Jamie never came back.  
Days pushed into weeks as they toughened (those left) up and trained them to serve under the Monroe Republic flag. If they didn't comply...They'd put a bullet between their eyes. Skylar lost all track of time and place. She became mindless and more silent much like Carter was. Every now again she would catch him staring, but it wasn't leering or looking her up and down like most of the boys here. He would just stare, with his deep blue eyes and she stare right back with hers, not afraid of him like the others.

Then came the day when they pulled her off to a room...Lt. Johnson stood over her as they strapped her down to a table. He reached into the pit of a small fire and pulled out a metal rod, the end of it was a bright, scorching orange and in the shape of the Monroe Republic emblem. She struggled under the straps however useless as he brought it over to her.  
"See...Militia soldiers aren't just born. We make em', and I think it's time for you to become an official member of the Monroe Militia"  
"No, please! No!" she screamed and cried as he took the scorching iron and pressed it to her skin and forcefully into her wrist. She screamed even louder in pain as the mark burned into her permanently. She could hear her own cries echoing down the halls of the prison. When he pulled it away, hot tears were rolling down her cheeks. They unstrapped Skylar from the table and dragged her back down the hall and into her cell, throwing her to the ground and walking away once they had locked her up again. She pushed herself up onto her knees with her arms but felt herself trembling, tears still falling from her face and splattering like rain drops onto the floor, spreading out into a million tiny puddles. She felt a calloused, rough hand gently grip hers. She looked up and Carter was kneeling in front of her,  
"The pain goes away quicker then you'd think"  
"But the mark will always be there" she croaked her reply, as there was another cry of pain that had been sitting in her throat and waiting to come out.  
But she pushed it back down.  
He only nodded slightly as he helped her get on her feet and over to the bunk. He grabbed one of his white t-shirts he wore under his uniform and ripped part of it into a long piece.  
"What are you doing?" she asked staring at him curiously.  
"You don't want it to get infected" he replied and came to sit next to her, having to sit on the very edge so he wouldn't have to bend over to avoid the low top bunk. He gently took her hand and started to wrap the ripped shirt around the burn. Even after he had tied it down, he continued to hold her hand,  
"You have rough hands for a girl" he said suddenly.  
"Thank you?" she furrowed her eye brows unsure of how to react to his comment.  
"How old are you? You seem young for what they usually take when they grab girls" he asked, finally letting go of her hand.  
"I turned seventeen two days ago...or maybe it was four days" she replied, nervously rubbing her hands together.  
"Happy birthday"  
"What about you?"  
"I turn twenty in a few months"  
"How many is a few?"  
"Next year" he smiled and she smiled back. She hadn't smiled in weeks, not since she had been with Chris the day they took her...  
"What's wrong?" he asked, when her smile faded just as quickly as it had come.  
"I've been branded like a cow. I'm now _officially_ a militia soldier"  
"It's not so bad"  
"How can you say that?"  
"It's better then the alternative" he replied, jabbing his thumb to the spot right between his eyes...  
"Sometimes i'm not so sure"  
"There were days when I thought a bullet between the eyes would be a blessing. That it was the only way to be free"  
"So why didn't you? Why didn't you do something to get that bullet"  
"Because i'm too much of a coward Skylar Jones, wouldn't be able to go through with it. Would you?"  
"Probably not..."  
"So what'd they get you for anyway? Despite the fact that you can beat the crap out of Roland you don't seem like a harden criminal to me"  
"I'd rather not talk about it"  
"Why? Did you do something really bad"  
"No"  
"Then what?"  
"They killed my...friend" she snapped, turning away from him and looking down at her bandaged wrist,  
"They killed him and we weren't even doing anything wrong. They took him because he had no family. Because the man who was supposed to be his father denied that he was his son so they tried to take him and he fought back"  
She felt the tears swelling in her eyes again as she thought about Chris and his body going still beneath her hands. Skylar felt Carter's hands move back over hers but she pulled them away, not wanting to accept his apologetic gesture.

"I'm sorry" he told her, but she didn't want to talk to him, let alone look at him anymore. He moved slowly over to his bunk and laid back, neither of them spoke to each other for several days and they both seemed to prefer it that way...

"I heard General Monroe himself was coming to inspect us" Jimmy said from inside the cell across from Skylar and Carter, his arms sticking through the bars as his face was pressed against them.  
"You hear a lot of things PL" replied Marcus, his cell mate. 'PL' stood for Pathological Lier, which is what Jimmy was so it sort of became like his nickname.  
"Where'd you hear it Jimmy?" Skylar asked him, walking over to her cell bars and leaning her head against them as she looked back at the scrawny boy.  
"From _the man_" he replied, "Heard the guards whispering the other day. I didn't quite make much out but I could have sworn they said something about someone named 'Matheson' and 'Power'...I bet they were talking about the aliens"  
"For the last time! Aliens did not cause the blackout" Marcus exclaimed smacking his palm to his face in frustration.  
"I swear! The night the lights went kaboom I swear I saw something flying in the sky!" he said his eyes wide.  
"You also told me when we met that you were high that night" Marcus replied.  
"That has nothing to do with what I saw"  
"How old were you PL?" Carter asked, looking over at him in amusement.  
"I was seven"  
"Where the hell did a seven year old get drugs?"  
"I was a drug dealer myself back in the day"  
"Of course you were PL" Marcus remarked, shaking his head at Skylar and Carter and trying not to laugh.  
"You know I still have some of my stash hidden back at my place. As soon as I can get the hell out of here we can go have some fun" Jimmy said mostly directing it at Skylar.  
"No thanks, Jimmy" she replied.  
"What about you big guy?" he asked Carter.  
"I don't think we're getting out of here any time soon kid"  
"You?" Jimmy said to Marcus.  
"Yes, the first thing I would love to do as soon as I get out of here PL is go and roll a few with you"  
"Well ya don't have to be so rude about it" he replied. Marcus was the same age as Carter, he was neither as tall or as muscular as him, but he wasn't scrawny like PL either. He had shortly cropped but still slightly curly black hair. Said his parents were originally from Brazil and he was born there but he had grown up in the United States before the blackout. English wasn't his first language either but he spoke it better than most people Skylar knew. PL on the other hand had fading bronzed skin, originally from Texas but just a year before the blackout his parents sent him off to a boarding school in New York. For all he knew his parents were dead...Or at least so he says, there was no way anyone could tell with him. He had muddy brown eyes and poorly kept dirty-blonde hair. It almost looked like someone had given him a hair cut with their eyes closed. Skylar looked them both over with contemplative eyes, wondering if they cared about becoming militia soldiers. If they had just accepted it by now or if they sometimes stayed up late like she did trying to come up with escape plans that they knew would never actually go through with...  
"How long do you think they'll keep us here for?" Skylar asked, not really directing it at a specific person.  
"Until we become mindless killers; bent on serving our overlord General Sebastian Monroe. Hail Monroe!" Jimmy replied standing straight up and taking his hand, forcing it flat before putting it to his forehead then raising it in the air in salute.  
"They'll beat you if they hear you talking like that" Carter said to Jimmy as he rose from his bunk and came to join Skylar by the cell bars.  
"Ah, whatever! I'm not afraid of those spineless dicks" he replied and winked with a smile at Skylar again. She smiled back but shook her head, not believing that he wasn't scared of them. As tough as everyone seemed here, there was still nothing more terrifying then Lt. Johnson and the thought of what would he would do to them for even the littlest things out of line.  
"What about you Skylar?" PL asked.  
"What about me?"  
"Where were you the night of the blackout"  
They all turned to look at her, intently waiting for her reply as she tried to remember.  
"I was seven. I was sitting in our living room, watching Lord of the Rings with my brothers and then the power just...went out"  
"What about you Carter?" Marcus asked.  
"I was sleeping" he answered a little too quickly. That's all he said as they all looked at him curiously, knowing that he was lying but not wanting to say anything because well...Carter scared them a bit too.

-  
"All right ladies! Time to get your lazy asses out of bed!" A militia guard yelled smacking a metal rod against the bars of all the cells to rally everyone up.  
That's when Skylar stepped back in horror, as the militia guard was Roland, already promoted, already deemed a valuable and loyal militia soldier. He stopped in front of her and Carter's cell once his own and smiled wickedly down at her.  
"We're going to have some fun today boys" he yelled to everyone, but she knew the snide comment was directed right at her. They opened the cells and pushed the now small group out into the prison yard. Skylar looked around to see she was the only girl left...Which troubled her more than made her proud of her versatility...  
"As militia soldiers" Roland yelled, "You must be able to take quite a deal of pain...and you need to be able to give it back no matter who the person; a small child...A girl..."  
Militia guards around the perimeter watched along the fences and the roof of the prison. Skylar, like the others, had expected Lt. Johnson to be running the 'drills' but instead Roland continued to talk, pacing back and forth as he spoke to them.  
"Do I have any volunteers?" he asked smirking viciously again, then looked right at Skylar without hesitation,  
"Ah, perfect. Why don't you come on up, Jones"  
Everyone turned to look at her as she hesitantly made her way forward towards Roland.  
"We still need one more" his eyes pretending to scan the small group of boys before they landed directly on Carter,  
"Come on"  
Carter moved forward, just as hesitantly and slow as Skylar had, his eyes darting to the guards on the roof holding the sniper rifles...Their fingers twitched over their guns as they watched them...  
"All right...Hit her"  
"Excuse me?" Carter exclaimed.  
"Hit her"  
Carter looked over at Skylar, her face was stone cold as she held back a glare for Roland then turned to look up at him instead. She nodded at him, and stood almost bracing herself for his fist but he didn't throw a punch.  
"Do it now" Roland yelled when Carter didn't move.  
"It's okay" Skylar whispered to Carter, whose eyes were apologetic as he looked down at her,  
"Don't hold back" she added with a slight smile as he hesitated before clenching his fist and sending it her way. It met her cheek with a loud smack. Even some of the other boys cringed as it sent her over and onto the ground with a loud THUD.  
Roland smiled in satisfaction then handed the metal rod he had been holding earlier to Carter,  
"Keep going" he ordered as Carter took the rod from him. Skylar pushed herself onto her feet again, as Carter gripped the rod, looking at her in dread as a thin line of blood trickled down from the corner of her mouth...  
"It's okay...Do it" she said to him but he still didn't move, his knuckles going white from clenching the metal rod tightly.  
"You heard her! Hit her again!" Roland yelled right in his ear. Suddenly Carter turned coldly to Roland, who took a step back with a look of horror and confusion sweeping across his face. Carter took the metal rod and swung it, smacking it right into the side of Roland's face. Marcus came up and pulled Skylar back away from Carter's sudden rage as he beat Roland bloody. Everyone watched, transfixed on the scene before them but no one was stopping it. Skylar looked up to the roof and towards the perimeter but none of the guards took shots...they just stood silent as they watched Carter beat Roland. He didn't kill Roland, but it knocked him out cold after several blows to the head. A frowning Lt. Johnson came out into the prison yard and nodded at two soldiers to take Roland to the infirmary.  
"You just can't cooperate can you?" he said to Carter as he swiped the bloody rod from his hand. Skylar looked on in horror, thinking he was going to shoot Carter in the head for what he did...but he just stood, staring down at Carter in blind fury.  
"Maybe you should call _daddy_" Carter remarked as he glared back up at Lt. Johnson.  
"He's already on his way" he replied and walked back inside the prison. Carter turned to look back at Skylar, her face plastered with a terrified expression as she looked right back at him. Jimmy and Marcus stood beside her still even as the others dispersed through out the yard for their 'Free Time', so it was called, most spreading out into their own little formed groups to practice beating on each other.  
"What the hell was that!" Marcus yelled, the first one to speak up as Carter moved a little closer to them. But Carter didn't answer still staring down at Skylar who's terrified expression now turned to confused anger.  
"Nothing" he replied finally, turning away from Skylar's glare to look at Marcus and Jimmy.  
"You're a tough kid you know that?" Marcus said to Skylar.  
"I have to be, don't I? It's better than the alternative" she replied to Marcus, but was still glaring at Carter.  
"JONES!" A guard called from the prison door and signaled for her to come to him. Skylar started to walk towards him, but Carter grabbed her arm gently to stop her. He wanted to apologize to her for hitting her so hard, but she tore her arm away from his grip and glared up at him again.  
"Don't touch me" she whispered angrily then continued to walk towards the impatiently waiting militia guard. The guard led her through the prison and shoved her into a large room, Lt. Johnson's office that also doubled as his sleeping quarters. A large desk stood in the middle, a small cot in the corner and a dark green trunk at the end of it for his clothes.  
"Please, have a seat" he said, gesturing to a grey, slightly rusted folding chair in front of his desk. Skylar obediently sat down as he continued to scribble words onto a piece of paper. Then signed his name at the bottom, folded it up, poured a red wax over the seal and stamped something over it. The symbol in the wax wasn't the militia emblem, but a pyramid with more strange markings she didn't recognize around it.  
"Refresh my memory, how long have you been with us?"  
"Um..five months, Sir" she replied, unsure of where this was going.  
"You seem to be at the center of a lot of trouble lately" he said, looking over at her with a hard glare.  
"I don't mean to be, Sir" she replied firmly, "I just want to serve General Monroe and our great nation"  
"That's not the way it seemed when you got here"  
"Captain Neville took me from a god awful life. A poor life, Sir. It's better now that I have something I can fight for. Something i'm useful for"  
"You're very good with your words girl. Yet I seem to have a hard time believing them"  
"You can believe what you want, but it's the truth, Sir"  
He watched her with a curious expression, studying her face trying to find an hint of the lies she was telling. But to her luck he believed her firm stance and had her sent back to her cell. Everyone was still out in the yard so she had time to herself before they brought Carter back to join her. She laid on the bottom bunk, thinking of yet another way she could escape then shaking her head knowing it would never work and even if it did she wouldn't get far before they caught her or would go after her family for her treason. Soon enough the guards started escorting everyone back to their cells, Carter was last in. As they shoved him in and locked the cell behind him, he looked down at Skylar not sure what to say or if he should say anything at all.  
"Hey," Marcus called from across the cell block, "Are you all right Sky?"  
"Yeah i'm fine. Don't call me that" she replied, ignoring Carter's gaze as she sat up on the bunk. A dark purple bruise was starting to form on her left cheek around the small cut there from Carter's wicked punch. He had barely been able to restrain himself from killing Roland earlier and now Skylar had chosen to shut him out instead of look upon him in awe for practically saving her. But he didn't blame her for the terrified expression when he had pulled the metal rod away from Roland's dented face before going too far, so he didn't blame her now for wanting to ignore him as much as possible. He continued to look her over, her hair had grown a bit from when she first came here and she was no longer that frightened girl that had been shoved into this cell. The beatings and undeserving punishments she had taken over the past three months had hardened her, but also made her stronger and well...more like a militia soldier. Although she never talked about herself or what her home had been like before she came here, he did know she had a family somewhere worrying about whether or not she was alive. No one said anything else as they sat in silence in their cells. When it grew late, a guard came around and blew out the flames of the lanterns that hung on the walls beside the cells. It grew darker and darker as they made their way down the hall putting out the lights. Carter laid back on his bunk, slightly glancing over at Skylar who was still sitting up...and now watching him intently. She seemed to be debating something over in her mind as she sat and stared back at him. The guard made his way back down the hall and out of the cell blocks which were completely dark now, except for the shimmer of light from the outside moon that shone through their skinny window. Carter could just make out Skylar's outline, still sitting on her bunk and facing his way.  
"What?" he whispered from across the tiny cell, he could just barely make out her face in the dark but he didn't need to see it to know she was staring coldly back at him.  
"Nothing" she replied and laid down, turning on her side so her back was to him. He stared mindlessly at her small, dark shape before turning onto his back and closing his eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Generals&BrokenMinds**

All the militia soldiers were on edge today. They were throwing out punishments like free candy; everyone was getting some. Jimmy snickered when a guard slightly tripped over his feet, so he pulled PL out of the line and beat him with the butt of his gun until other guards were forced to pull him off. It was like this all day, they would beat them if they stared at a militia soldier for too long or if their uniforms weren't tucked in all the way or even if they just scratched their nose. Even Lt. Johnson was on edge, this morning when they had gathered the MIT (Militia In Training) in the dining hall he barely spewed out his long speech on nation loyalty or 'common place'. He just strolled into the hall, his mind clearly somewhere else as he seemed to be muttering to himself.  
"What do you thinks going on?" Marcus whispered to PL, Skylar and Carter as they walked to one of the tables in the corner of the room. Skylar placed her food tray down on the table in front of her, she looked down at the grey-green slop splattered in her bowl in disgust and pushed the tray a few inches away from her when she sat on the rickety red bench.  
"Who knows?" she replied to Marcus as he sat next to her and already starting to shove a spoonful of grey-green something into his mouth.  
"I 'hink-" Jimmy said with his mouth already full as well.  
"Aliens" the other three said in unison.  
"No" he snarled after swallowing, "The General is coming today"  
"The General?" Skylar repeated, her voice sharp and small from fear.  
"Not this again. Why would General Monroe or Matheson bother themselves with us?" Marcus chastised and rolled his eyes.  
"Maybe not Monroe, but Matheson is the one who set the training standards for militia soldiers. It would actually make sense if he came for some sort of inspection" Carter replied as he pushed the grey slop away from him after tasting it. He pushed it to Jimmy, who clearly enjoyed the unknown substance and who honestly could use the bulk anyway. Skylar's fingers nervously moved over her legs, she had never believed PL's theories, but the evidence on this one was overwhelming and she kept thinking about Carter's comment.  
It would make sense if General Matheson was coming. It had been almost seven months since she got here and technically they were built for being militia soldiers...maybe not mentally but their physical training was taking affect, even Jimmy seemed to be showing more muscle recently.  
"Whether it's because the General is coming or not, they're on edge and we need to be careful" Marcus whispered after a guard had passed by their table and was a good distance away from them.  
"Too late for me" Jimmy said, lightly tapping one of the many deep blue-purple bruises on his face.  
"Just don't get into any more trouble or they might kill you next time" he replied.  
"ALL RIGHT LADIES!" yelled Lt. Johnson as he stood on one of the benches to look down on all of them,  
"Today...You will learn how to shoot a gun"  
Murmurs spread throughout the room when he said 'gun'. After eating everyone was pushed back into their cells to change into their clean uniforms, women who worked in the prison camp as cooks and janitors would come by each cell to grab the worn uniforms for cleaning and mending. Skylar and Carter were always last, being the very last cell in the block.

It had been six and a half months; at first Skylar had thought it absolutely ridiculous that they would make her change in front of, let alone share a cell, with a boy. But now she didn't think twice about it as she unbuttoned the front of her blue militia shirt. She knew Marcus and Jimmy were friends with her now that they wouldn't look...but then again they were boys...She'd move to the corner in the back of the cell, the one at the end of Carter's bunk because it cut off the viewing angle to the cell diagonal from them. There was a white cloth on each side of the long blue arm sleeves of her shirt, one was printed with the Monroe Republic emblem while the other was a number. Skylar was 53 and Carter was 37, despite there only being about thirty "recruits". She stared at them now, running her finger over the outline of the 'M' of the Monroe emblem.  
"Jones"  
Carter's voice jolted her back and when she looked up he was staring at her, and doing a very good job of keeping his eyes to hers as the only thing keeping her chest from being completely bare was the black bra,  
"They're coming"  
She had never thought any boy would look at her again the way Chris use to. That look of leering and longing and as much as she hated it, she was finding she missed it...or maybe it was just she missed Chris...She wasn't sure but as she looked back at Carter there was a slight flittered of his eyes down on her body as he turned away again. Her body wasn't something to admire...at least it wasn't anymore. Despite her almost perfect curves she was covered in deep bruises and scars from punishments...  
She shook her mind off the slight rise of the corners of his mouth when he had looked at her. Grabbing her clean shirt and pants she threw them on and shoved the dirty ones through the bars just as the women were passing with the basket. When they left she buttoned up her clean shirt, the same emblem and the same number on the sleeve, and tucked it into the blue militia pants. She then tucked the ends of the pants into her boots and started to wrap and tie the laces around. Carter was doing the same when they heard the clanging of guns and swords against the cell bars.  
They both shot straight up, standing still in front of their bunks as guards came down the rows yelling at several boys for being slow and lazy as they changed.  
"You four, _dream team_" one said as he got down to Skylar, Carter, Marcus and PL,  
"You're to be separated from now on"  
"Why?" Skylar blurted it out before she could stop herself. Marcus and PL looked at her horrified as the soldier glared down on her. She saw Carter's face as he held his breath and tightly closed his eyes, knowing the mistake she had just made. The guard unlocked the cell door and walked in. He was the same height as her, his spiky blonde hair giving his height maybe an inch or so extra. He had to be in his early thirties, a thick but short, blonde beard covered the lower half of his face. She could smell the whiskey or some form of alcohol on his breath when he grew just inches away from her. His eyes looked her over in a cold stare, then he ripped his hand from his side and squeezed his fingers around her neck. She didn't fight it, she didn't struggle even as he continued to constrict his fingers around her throat. She couldn't look back into his face, she turned her eyes away and to Carter. His hands were clenched in tight fists at his side, his face trying to hold back the anger boiling in him. He caught her eyes and could tell she was saying no, just by the way she was looking at him. As much as he wanted to knock the militia guard off of his smug feet and beat him senselessly he didn't; because she was telling him not to.  
"You've been more trouble then you're worth, you little bitch. I'm surprised Lt. Johnson hasn't put one right there" he spoke in a harsh tone, jabbing his thumb at the small spot right between her eyes. He moved his thumb slowly down the bridge of her nose and over her lips. He moved his fingers over her chin gripping it while his other hand was still clasped tight around her throat. She was starting to panic, she could barely breathe now and the look in his eye was no longer that harsh, cold stare. It was that stare of longing, and certainly not the one she had always gotten from Chris...This one scared her.  
He moved his lips to her ear, his scratchy beard moving roughly over her cheek as he whispered to her.  
"You're mine"  
She continued to stare at Carter, he almost stepped forward but she slightly shook her head telling him no again. The militia soldier patted her cheek lightly before throwing her to the floor. Her hand moved over her chest and gripped her shirt as she tried to catch her breath. She could feel the bile rising in her throat but she forced it down, not wanting to get sick in front of them. The guard grabbed Carter and shoved him out of the cell, another guard grabbed Marcus and PL and escorted them down the hall. They left her there, alone, slamming and locking the cell behind them before moving back down the hall and out of her sight. Even when she heard the door at the end of the cell blocks close she continued to lay on the ground. She curled into a ball, her hand gripping her stomach and tears running down her face as she listened to the deafening silence that surrounded her. Skylar was the only one left as they had lead everyone to the cell blocks on the other side of the prison...They did this not to change things up...Not to just break up the so called _dream team_ but to break her...Leaving her in a solitary confinement like some sort of ordeal.  
Utterly,  
And completely,  
Alone.

Skylar didn't know if it was something the militia guards had done or if just being alone made her feel colder.

_It's summer...It shouldn't be this cold..._

She shivered excessively, even after pulling the sheets and blankets from the other cots around her body. She hadn't seen Marcus, PL or Carter in at least a week...Though she couldn't be sure how long it had been. They wouldn't tell her and it was becoming hard to keep track.

She never left that small room.

They brought her food and didn't bother letting her out for training so the most she could do was push ups and sit ups, maybe even jumping jacks if she felt she had enough energy. Most of her day was now spent staring at the blank walls and bars around her. She noticed things now that she hadn't before, like on the wall beside Carter's old bed was a large blood stain, it was old but she could still clearly see the splattered pattern of the dried fluid. She sat now, staring at the dried blood, her face worn and tired since sleeping was no longer an option; either from nightmares or the militia guards that would run down the hall, clanging their swords against the bars of the cells.  
"_The winds of the night..._" She started to sing, her voice just barely a whisper,  
"_so softly are sighing. Soon they will fly your troubles to sea..."_

"..._So-so...close your eyes on hush-a-bye mountain..._"  
She stuttered and choked on every word, images of her little sister flashing through her mind.  
"_And wave goodbye to cares of the day..._"  
The long blonde curls...The big blue puppy dog eyes...her wide, giggling smile...  
"_And watch your boat from hush-a-bye mountain..._"  
Her voice was hoarse and dry...holding back tears as she continued...  
"_Sail far away...from lullaby bay_"

"WE ARE YOUR FAMILY" the soldier yelled, sending a fist to her face, "SAY IT"  
"No!" she screamed and spit in his face.  
"YOU WILL FIGHT FOR US! FOR THE MONROE REPUBLIC!"  
"NO!"  
He punched her again...and again...and again. When he finally pulled his fists away, stepping back to look at the girl tied down in the metal chair that was bolted to the floor. She was giggling...no, she was laughing hysterically.  
"Is that all you got?" she smirked up at him, blood covering her teeth and dripping out the side of her mouth. Her darkening blonde hair fell all around her, now hanging below her shoulders in wet waves. The militia soldier nodded to the men behind her, they threw an already drenched towel tightly over her face and held back her head by pulling her hair. The soldier who had been beating on her grabbed a large bucket of water that sat against the wall...empty buckets laid every where, and some were still full and lined against the dark, cold wall of the re-programming room.  
He brought the bucket over to Skylar and started to pour the water right over her mouth and nose. She thrashed and kicked as hard as she could, but her bonds were tight and cut deeper into her skin as she did.  
"Who do you fight for?" the soldier asked when the bucket had emptied and he threw it back behind him and the others removed the towel from her face. She spewed and coughed up water. Her lungs burning, her breath strained and heavy,  
"Go screw..." she gasped as she turned a cold glare up at him,  
"Yourself"  
So...They did it again.

They had taken the bunks away, she now laid on the hard floor once again curled up in a ball.

She was weak and tired; her body ached all over and blood still caked her face. She tried to remember the house she grew up in...She tried to remember that little girl, the one with the blonde curls but she couldn't...  
_What was her name?_

It gave her a headache trying to remember so she stopped, leaving her mind in a blank state as she stared at the wall with the splattered blood stain.

"Have you learned your lesson"  
She was sitting in Lt. Johnson's office...Almost dazed...she couldn't remember how she had gotten there...  
"Yes"  
"So you know now, how your friends abandoned you. Your family, happy now that your off in a better place as they no longer need you"  
"Yes" she replied, her voice as monotone and dulled as her emotions.  
"You know who your real family is?" Lt. Johnson asked.  
"Yes"  
"And who is your real family? Who do you serve?"  
"I serve the Monroe Republic, Generals Monroe and Matheson. The Monroe Militia is my family"  
"Will you stand with your family"  
"Yes"  
"Will you kill for your family"  
"Yes"  
"Will you die for your family"  
She looked up at him without even the slightest hesitation as she answered again,  
"Yes"


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Fathers&BrokenHearts**

She was led out of Lt. Johnson's office and into the dining hall. It was early morning and they were serving what smelled like biscuits and what she guessed was gravy...It was quite extravagant for their standards and it made her curious to why they were bothering. All the trainees stared at her as she walked into the hall, the guards shoved her through the door (even though their forcefulness wasn't at all necessary). She made her way down the line, the women behind the counter slopped the "gravy" into a small bowl and threw two biscuits onto her plate, staring as intensely at her as everyone else. She turned and looked over the tables and faces, finding Marcus, PL and Carter in their normal spot in the back corner.

They were all gawking at her.

Skylar waved happily to them and made her way over with a large smile. The other trainees went back to eating but her friends continued to stare wide eyed. As she grew close, Marcus stood up and slowly met her as she placed her tray down beside PL.

She smiled brightly up at him, "Hey" she said in a uplifting tone.

He looked down at her, his hand moving over her cheek then he grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her into a tight hug.  
"We thought they had killed you" he whispered in her ear. He wouldn't let go of her, so she turned her head and looked over at PL and Carter. PL looked like he was going to cry, but he forced a large smile which helped calm him down. She turned to Carter and smiled at him but he didn't return it as his eyes darted to all the deep gashes and still darkly purple bruises on her face and neck.  
"How long has it been?" she asked still staring at Carter even when Marcus pulled away.  
"You mean you don't know?" PL said as she moved to sit next to him and Marcus sat beside her, keeping a tight grip on her hand as he did.  
"No" she shook her head.  
"It's been a little over two months" Marcus spoke so softly it was almost a whisper.  
"What did they do to you" Carter questioned firmly. His eyes still on her wounds but she just continued to smile and tilted her head slightly like she didn't know what he was talking about,  
"Nothing" she replied shrugging it off. Carter, PL and Marcus looked between each other, looks of worried confusion on their faces.  
"It doesn't look like nothing" Carter said turning his eyes back to hers. She stared right back at him coldly,  
"They wouldn't hurt me" she replied, "I'm just so clumsy sometimes"  
Carter's face went rigid, Marcus and PL just continued to stare at her blankly as she scooped up a biscuit and took a whopping bite. Carter suddenly stood up and started to walk towards the door out of the dining hall,  
"Where are you going?" Skylar called after him but he didn't answer as he disappeared behind the door.  
"Skylar...What do you remember about coming here?" Marcus asked her.  
"What do you mean?" she asked.  
"I mean, do you know how you got here, to the prison"  
"You mean the training camp?" she said putting down her biscuit,  
"Yes..." Marcus replied looking at her, still steeping in worry.  
"You know, I don't really remember" she shrugged it off again.

Carter angrily pushed his way down the hall, militia guards watching him in curiosity as he did...but not stopping him. He pushed the door to Lt. Johnson's office open and stormed in.  
"What the fuck did you do to her!" he yelled, interrupting the small chatter between Johnson and Roland. Roland smirked viciously as he walked past Carter and left the office.  
"I told you" he said smiling, "I told you a long time ago your actions would have dire consequences"  
"What did you do to her!" he repeated, his voice still harsh and demanding as he spoke.  
"We did to her what needed to be done"  
"What needed to be done? You son of a bitch!"  
Carter slammed Johnson up against the wall, but he just laughed. Carter threw his hand around his neck and squeezed.  
"That," said a firm voice from behind, "is enough"  
Carter let go and Johnson gathered himself, coughing and gasping for air. Carter turned, his father was standing in the door way with a defiant stare.  
"General Monroe" Lt. Johnson spoke when he could properly breath again, "We weren't expecting you until tonight"  
"Get out" he said to Johnson, but not removing his glare from Carter.  
"But Sir I-"  
"Get out, now"  
He didn't need to be asked twice as Sebastian Monroe, General of the Monroe Militia slammed the door behind him. Carter glared up at his father, he was terrified of him but he never let it show because Monroe thrived on that; the power and fear he had over others.  
"Lt. Johnson and Lt. Roland have been sending me reports saying that you aren't living up to your potential and that you and some girl are causing quite a bit of trouble"  
"They're both sadistic fucks and should go slit their own damn throats before I do it for them"  
"I put you in here for a reason James" he said sternly walking up to him, "If I had just handed you a position as an officer how would that make me look? You needed to rise in the ranks. Your talent and knowledge alone should have you allowed you to do so by now. You've been here for over two years"  
"If you're disappointed that I haven't turned out exactly like you then just say so. Don't beat around the bush"  
"Fine. I'm disappointed in you. So get your _sorry excuse for a son_ ass together and do what you were born to do"  
"You mean kill men and their sons? Rape women? Torture children?"  
"It's necessary if we want to establish ourselves as a nation, as a whole nation we must do it with force"  
"A nation will never be whole if it's root is so corrupt and evil"  
"I swear to god James, if you turn on me I will not hesitate to put a bullet in your head...I will not hesitate to putting a bullet in _her's_ either"  
Sebastian left the room, and as soon as he did Lt. Johnson walked back in, probably having heard the whole conversation. He just smirked as James Carter Monroe pushed past him and out the door. Everyone was already back in their rooms to get ready for morning training, when he got to his he saw Skylar was there and setting up her bunk.  
"Where were you?" she asked but with a smile. His heart practically stopped when he saw her, she was unbuttoning her shirt...Burn scars covered her entire body. Most were just small lines and only a few were still even recent. Along with her burn scars were deep bruises and poorly healed cuts.  
"Bathroom" he said looking away from her tarnished body. They were no longer in barred cells, but more like bedrooms...almost. The doors locked from the outside, probably had been used for the more dangerous criminals back before the black out...Though it was still like a prison as guards constantly monitored the halls and the rooms smelled like death warmed over.  
"Marcus and PL said they'd show me how to use a gun since i've missed it cause I was sick" she said pulling on a clean white t-shirt then her spare blue militia uniform with the number 53 stitched on the sleeve.  
"Is that where you think you were? In the infirmary sick!"  
"Why are you yelling at me?" she looked over at him with sad blue eyes.  
"I'm sorry...I didn't mean..." he looked at her, she was lost. She was no longer that girl who fought hard against guys twice the size of her...no longer that girl who would have done anything to fight her way out of this. She was utterly lost and it showed in her eyes.  
"I'm sorry, i'm not angry at you I just...missed you"  
He tried to smile, it came out weak and she must have been able to tell it was forced because she looked at him with worried inspection. But then she smiled and continued to clean up her things before reaching for the door,  
"You coming?" she asked when he didn't move. He nodded and followed her out as they headed towards the prison yard.  
Large foam boards painted with red targets laid a short distance in front of them. Marcus brought her a gun, the bullets were only plastic pellets as they didn't want them practicing with real ones since the supplies have dwindled since the blackout...and the obvious fear that the trainees would use them against the guards.  
"This is the chamber here" he said pointing to part of the gun, "That's where the ammo goes. Load it, slip this part back then cock it like that and slide this over"  
She watched Marcus as his fingers pointed to all the different parts and how to do this...how to do that...blah blah blah.  
Carter's mind was more focused on the conversation with his father and Skylar being alive and...different.  
"Got it?" Marcus said to her as she looked up at him cluelessly.  
"Yeah I think so" she answered taking the BB gun from his hands, he stood behind her and helped her get in stance as he showed her how to hold and aim. Marcus touched and held her waist as he pushed her feet out with his own foot so she steadied herself as she raised the weapon. Seeing the way he touched her made Carter build in fury but he held it in because PL was watching him.  
"Are you all right?" he asked when Carter looked away from Marcus and Skylar.  
"Yeah why?"  
PL looked back at Marcus, his hand gently caressing her shoulder as she took aim and his body was pushed right up against hers.  
"No reason" he replied sending Carter a small smirk. Carter ignored him as Skylar pulled the trigger, cocked the gun then pulled it again. After doing this a few times she lowered the gun and Marcus moved in front of her smiling widely.  
"Let's go see how you did" he said as she smiled back at him. They all walked over to the foam board...Each of her shots had hit the round, red dot in the center of the foam board.  
"Damn, freckles" Marcus said, "You're good"  
"I had a good teacher" she said to him. She was smiling up at him, her eyes dancing as he smiled back...They were flirting and it made Carter even angrier. He turned away from them and headed back towards the prison.  
"What's with him?" Skylar asked PL, who only shrugged and followed.  
"Come on, let's keep practicing" Marcus said.  
PL had to sprint on his short legs to catch up with Carter as he made it to the door and inside.  
"Do you want something PL?" he said without looking behind him, only knowing it was PL from his heavy, short of breath wheezes.  
"What is wrong with you? You're just gonna let him win her over? Just like that?"  
"I don't know what you're talking about"  
"Oh come on man! I see the way you look at her when you think no one is watching. The way you looked at her when she walked in the mess hall this morning"  
"If you know what's good for you PL, you'll shut your trap hole before I have to shut it for you"  
"They did something to her and you know"  
That made Carter stop and turn to face him...before he could think of what to say PL spoke again.

"She's not the same person"

"You've only known her for what? Five, six months?" I retorted, "What makes you think she's changed?"

"You've noticed it to" PL answered hotly, "But fine if you're going to ignore it and pretend like they didn't brainwash her then I guess there's nothing _I can do_ right?"

PL walked away angrily, heading back towards the rooms...

Carter knew of course...He was militia since before he could even walk. He had grown up in the life and it was all he had ever known. So it wasn't anything strange to him when Skylar had come back changed and suddenly obedient...

It wasn't that they had done it that had made Carter furious...It was that they had done it to _her_.

Carter went back to his room, he laid back on his cot, closing his eyes tightly...

_Only a few more months_...he thought.

_Just a few more months then i'll be out of here and back home..._

But there was something still tearing at him...something telling him that he couldn't go back to that life.

Not in Philly at least.

He was okay with being militia.

He was okay with being a soldier, it was all he was good for...

It was working with his father he couldn't handle. Working under his orders, and having to take them without question...He'd rather have his own unit, his own band of militia soldiers to parade around the republic.

He wanted to do better than his father ever did with this nation.

"Hey"

He opened one eye and squinted into the darkness, he could just make out Skylar as she opened and closed the door slowly.

"Have you ever heard of a candle?" she laughed, grabbing a match and lighting the two candles that hung on each side of the door.

"I prefer the darkness"

She just smiled and went to her cot, pulling off her boots and letting them fall to the floor with a smack. Skylar laid on her side so she could face him, she watched him as he stared at the ceiling...it took him a while to realize she was staring,

"What?" he asked quietly.

"Nothing...just thinking of something Marcus said"

"And what did Marcus say?"

"He said he's been here for almost a year"

"And so..."

"He said that when he got here you were already here" she answered,

"And that you had told him you had already been here for a while before that"

"What's your point Skylar?"

"How long have you been here?"

"Two year an a half years. Give or take a few weeks"

Skylar shot up right, staring at him wide eyed, "You're joking right?"

"Nope. It'll be three years in a few weeks"

"That's...that's insane! Why have you been here that long?"

"Cause they can't mold me"

"But...I don't mean to be imprudent but wouldn't they have just killed you?"

"I don't know" Carter lied.

"But it's weird right? I mean it doesn't make sense why they would bother to keep you this long especially..."

"Especially after everything with Roland...and that first day they forced them to gang up on you"

"Yeah" she nodded slightly.

"Maybe that's why they're keeping me around"

"Yeah...maybe"

Lt. Johnson had everyone lined up in the training yard that evening. Skylar looked up to the roof of the prison and she could see the militia soldiers with their sniper rifles in hand...

Whatever was happening it wasn't going to be pleasant.

"It seems you ladies," Lt. Johnson yelled loudly with Roland standing smugly by his side,

"Need a little more discipline!"

Lt. Johnson and Roland were going to teach them hand to hand combat...only if they messed up or let their partner take them out they were violently abused by Roland and his (as Skylar put it) _fat fists_.

And unfortunately for Skylar, Roland still had a grudge on her so he of course paired her with the tallest, strongest boy in the group...some nineteen year old named Fry.

He was large and scary looking but he was also dumb as nails. At first Skylar was terrified as he towered over her...but then she remembered her strengths when it came to fighting any one of these guys;

Her small size compared to them was her biggest strength.

She was quicker and lighter on her feet then they were. Sure they could pack a punch but it only really mattered if they could catch her off guard long enough to even make contact with her face. Fry was fat and extremely slow, giving her the advantage that within a few minutes he was already tired and she was just getting started.

She used his weight against him as he went in for a swing and missed as she ducked. She spun her leg out behind his, causing him to fall flat on his back.

Roland had been watching intently the entire time. He walked over to them, kicking Fry hard in the face when he didn't get off the ground.

"Get your sorry ass up! You should be ashamed you let a little girl knock you flat!" Roland yelled and kicked him again. Everyone was watching now as Roland continued to kick him...Lt. Johnson was smiling...Skylar caught Carter's eye, he was shaking his head at her...He knew what she was about to do.

She wanted to stop Roland, Fry was bleeding profusely now and soon enough Roland would kick him till his brain hemorrhaged. Carter held her gaze firm, he was still shaking his head at Skylar. She could see his hands clenched into tight fists...she knew if she got involved then so would he...

So she didn't do anything.

She stayed frozen, cringing with every kick to the face Roland gave Fry till she had to close her eyes because she could bring herself to look at his mangled and bloody face. Roland finally stopped when Fry was no longer conscious and walked right up to Skylar. She opened her eyes only to meet his with a defiant glare.

"That's a good girl" he whispered with a wide, satisfied smirk then walked back over to Lt. Johnson while militia soldiers came to drag Fry off to the infirmary.

"Jones" called Lt. Johnson while the others got back to the exercise, "Come here for a moment"

Skylar walked obediently over to Lt. Johnson and Roland,

"Yes, sir?"

"You will be sitting out for the rest of the day"

"Why sir?"

"Because it seems that these _girls_ are too afraid to hit you and we can't have that" he replied harshly, clearly annoyed that she was questioning orders.

"But sir-"

"You do have ears don't you, Jones?" Roland commented snidely.

"It just doesn't make sense sir" she said, ignoring Roland.

"And what don't you understand about a direct order?"

"If you want them to hit me without flinching" she answered firmly, "_Then make them hit me_"

Roland was almost taken aback by her comment and Lt. Johnson just pursed his lips in a curious manner.

"If that's what you want" Lt. Jonson said, "Then that's what you'll get"

He looked towards everyone as they were still practicing, Skylar caught Marcus and Jimmy's eyes as they were partners. Marcus's face was steeping in worry, they both were but Jimmy was hiding it better...

"ALL RIGHT LADIES!" Lt. Johnson called out and everyone froze to listen to him,

"It seems that Jones here is feeling babied, and would like you to show the same curtsey that you show each other!"

Everyone looked around at one another...Then turned to stare at Skylar...

"Roland if you'd hold Jones back"

"Wait-" Skylar exclaimed, but Roland grabbed her arms and pulled them back behind her as he tightened his grip to hold her still.

"Well go on! The girl wants to be a human punching bag so hit her!" Lt. Johnson yelled at all of them.

All of them...

They all hesitated before making a line in front of her.

So she was right, they were scared to hurt her.

They each threw a few punches before moving to the back of the line. They slugged her anywhere on her body that seemed appropriate...they seemed to enjoy hitting her in the face though. Then came Marcus...Him, Carter and Jimmy had made sure to stay in the back of the line...not that it would make a difference but it was a nice enough gesture.

Skylar watched as Marcus bit his lip back, hesitating before punching her in the gut.

It killed him to do so but he knew she could take it, especially since he wasn't giving his full force. Jimmy did the same thing, making sure not to hit hard but also making sure that it _looked_ like he was. Carter was last, by the time he got to her she was already slightly out of it...Her face was completely swollen, cut and bruised from the repetitive hits. Her entire body was slumping so that Roland no longer had to hold a tight grip.

"Don't you think she's had enough" Carter commented, staring angrily at Lt. Johnson.

"Not until everyone has gone twice, Monroe"

_Monroe_...Skylar thought,

_Did he just call Carter "Monroe"?_

"She can barely even stand" Carter exclaimed almost calmly, "She's had enough"

"If you don't hit her, I will!" Lt. Johnson yelled. Carter looked down at Skylar,

"I'm sorry" he whispered and she just barely nodded back. He was about to swing when Roland stopped him,

"Hold it! In the face," he remarked coldly, "_please_"

Carter was going to hit her in the face...he was going to hit her in the face as hard as he could. If this was going to end he needed to knock her out so they would be forced to bring her to the infirmary.

So he hit her, again and again until suddenly her eyes closed and didn't open...She no longer was holding herself up as Roland let her drop to the ground. There was blood covering his fist, the skin of his knuckles had cracked and started to bleed...mingling with the blood that had smeared off of Skylar's face from each time his fist had made contact...He felt sickened by what he had done. He couldn't bring himself to look at her mangled face as Roland and another soldier carried her back into the prison.

"If you want to get out of here, James" Lt. Johnson whispered, having come to stand right in front of him,

"Then i'd suggest you learn to follow orders"

Carter stayed silent as Lt. Johnson backed away.

"Lunch time, ladies!" Johnson yelled and headed back towards the prison...

"I haven't seen her all day" Marcus said slightly frantic, "Do you think they put her back in solitary confinement?"

"No...No she took hard hits" Carter replied, "She probably won't be back until tomorrow, maybe even two days"

"Yeah no thanks to you" Marcus snarled.

"I was doing her a favor you dumb shit"

"To hell you were!"

"Actually, he was" PL interjected before Marcus could get the idea to punch Carter out,

"He knocked her out so that it wouldn't continue"

"Well you smashed her face in, so i'm not going to be grateful about it"

"Good to know what you really care about" Carter retorted.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean"

"It means exactly what it means-"

"You two need to stop being dicks" PL yelled over the both of them,

"If either of you really cared about Skylar you would stop this childishness and get over yourselves"

Marcus and Carter were still glaring intensely, but they kept quiet and moved away from each other. They had skipped lunch, waiting all day for Skylar to come back and only leaving when they had evening training...Marcus and PL went to dinner but Carter skipped and headed back to his room, hoping Skylar would be there.

He sighed in relief when he opened the door and saw her,

"Skylar"

"Hey" she smiled crookedly. Carter ran to her and hugged her tightly,

"Ow" she exclaimed, her face grimacing, "go easy there tiger"

"Sorry"

Carter pulled away, but his hands gripped her shoulders as he looked down at her.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah, i'll be fine" she smiled again but it hurt her to move the muscles in her face because she grimaced again and her smile disappeared.

"I'm sorry" Carter whispered.

"It's wasn't your fault," she replied, "It was me and my big mouth"

"You don't deserve it"

"And you shouldn't be talking back to them all the time"

"Maybe you should take your own advice?" he looked at her a bit sternly, "Besides they won't hurt me"

"Right, because you're Monroe's son"

"Yeah, I guess you know my secret now"

"Were you ever going to tell me?"

"I didn't want you to think differently of me"

"As apposed to now where you lied about who you really were?"

"I didn't lie my name is Carter" he replied with a half smile, "Well, my middle name anyway"

"What? Carter isn't even your first name?"

"No it's...it's James"

"Like Jimmy" she said, forcing a smile through the pain.

"No, not like Jimmy"

"It's cute you guys have the same name" she laughed, "We can all you guys Jim and Jimmy"

"No, stop it"

"What you don't like the name James?"

"No, it's probably why I make people call me Carter" he remarked cheekily.

"All right, no need to be so touchy"

"You should go get something to eat" Carter dropped his hands away from her shoulders, "Marcus and Jimmy will want to see you"

"I'm not really hungry"

"They'll still want to see you"

"I'm kind of tired and really sore" she said softly, "I just want to sleep it off"

Carter nodded as he moved over to his cot and Skylar moved to hers,

"Carter" she called gently as he was lying back on his cot.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks...for punching me out"

"Your welcome, Jones"


	7. Chapter 7

okay just an FYI I'm starting to write in individual POV's because it's easier...Thanks for reading :)

* * *

**Chapter 7: Placements&TheBrokenDreamTeam**

***Skylar Jones***

They had us lined up outside of Lt. Johnson's office. He was telling us individually where we'd be place...then we were to head out tomorrow.

"Jones!"

Jimmy nudged me forward as the door to Lt. Johnson's office opened and a guard was ushering for me to go inside. I looked back at Jimmy as the door was closing, he was giving me a thumbs up with the goofiest smile plastered on his face. But I couldn't smile back, mostly from my still bruised and swollen face but also because I was terrified of what they were going to do with me...

"Sit Ms. Jones"

_At least he said Ms. this time and didn't slur my name like it was a disgusting vile, thing._

"You've come along way since you first came here" he said, his pasty white fingers gripping a pen tightly as he scribbled over a piece of paper hastily.

"I had my doubts about you and to be honest I had never expected you to even make it past one week"

_Those kind of low blows I was use to by now but I was starting to get even more anxious as he dragged on and on..._

"I honestly thought you'd be dead by now. It's no secret that Sgt. Roland has it out for you"

"Sir-"

"Let me finish" he hushed, "Despite that you talk back, you are one of the strongest female soldiers we've had in a long time"

He paused for a moment as he concentrated on the piece of paper in front of him. I peeked over just slightly while he wasn't paying attention and only caught him scribble his signature at the bottom before folding the paper and stuffing it into an envelope.

"And strangely enough we've had a request for you" he continued, "From Captain Neville"

"What?"

"He's requested you, Monroe, Tyler, and Fry to join his unit in Philadelphia"

"Why...why did he request me?"

"Are you questioning a superior officer's order?"

"No sir, i'm just curious as to why Captain Neville requested me"

"He didn't say" he replied sternly, "You're to report in a week. You'll be leaving tomorrow with the rest, Captain Baker and his unit will be escorting you"

"Is that all, sir"

"Yes, now get the hell out"

I shot up and practically ran from the room, going out I threw Jimmy an exasperated look...He just smiled again. I forced a small smile, knowing we would talk later...and have to say goodbye. There was only a few people left after Jimmy. Carter and Marcus had already went through and I could only suspect that they're waiting for me in back in our room.

"So?" Marcus asked, jumping up from my cot as soon as I entered the room.

"Philly, Captain Neville's unit"

"Yeah me too" Carter said.

"Marcus?"

"Boston"

My heart sank into my feet,

"What..."

"Yeah, i'm joining some unit up there that deals with manning Canadian Border"

"But..."

I didn't even know what to say, I felt sick to my stomach...This is what I had been afraid of, being separated from them. I went over and sat on the edge of my cot, letting myself sink down onto the thin mattress and running my hands over my face and through my hair.

"Hey, are you all right?"

Marcus came and sat beside me, putting his hand gently on my back.

"No" I replied and looked up at him.

"I just thought...hoped that we..."

"You'll be fine without me" he smiled, then hesitated before speaking again,

"Besides...you'll have Carter. You'll be fine I promise"

I looked up at him sadly.

I didn't want to say goodbye...

"I'll miss you, freckles" he whispered and lightly nudged me with his elbow.

I didn't even hesitate when I grabbed the collar of his shirt, pulling him in and pushing my lips against his.

My lips were still slightly swollen and chapped from the beating the day before...so I couldn't imagine it was quite pleasant.

But it didn't really matter.

I was probably never going to see him again with the possibility that we might pass each others units but those odds were extremely low and who knows what could happen to any one of us out on a mission...

So it didn't really matter what it felt like just that the gesture was there. Then I felt his hand reach up and caress my cheek, pulling me back in when I had let our lips part. The hand he still had on my back moved down to grip my waist...

I heard the door open and close rather loudly...Carter must have left...

But I didn't bother to check as we continued to kiss, my hands loosening their grip on his tee shirt and drifting over his chest. Our lips moved slowly, almost gracefully over each others before I pulled away and opened my eyes.

"Whoa" Marcus smirked at me wildly. His eyes dancing all over me before settling on my eyes again...

"I hope that's a good whoa?" I whispered.

"It's a _very_ good whoa" he replied but suddenly his smile faded, "But..."

"But?"

"It just makes things harder"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be" he smiled again, but it was small and I could tell he was forcing it to try and make me feel better.

"Listen" he whispered, brushing a strand of hair back behind my ear, "Who knows what's going to happen in the next few weeks, or months. If we'll ever see each other again or if we'll even make it the first week. But if...if we do see each other again; if our paths cross or our units change...will you even still feel the same?"

"A lot can happen in a few weeks Marcus, even more in a few months"

"Are you saying that you'd move on then?"

"As much as I hate to, we have to be realistic"

"Then why'd you kiss me?" he asked angrily, "We could have avoided this whole mess in the first place!"

He got up from the cot, but didn't leave. He stood with his back to me, one hand placed on his hip as the other ran back through his hair.

"I didn't want to leave not without letting you know I cared"

"You know" he said, turning back around and smiling again, "You didn't have to kiss me to show me you cared"

"I know but it was nice" I replied with a small laugh.

"It was" he nodded.

"Can we do it again?"

He laughed then smirked with that wild smile again, "You continue to amaze me, freckles"

"I'll miss that," I grinned widely, "you calling me freckles"

"I'll miss calling you freckles"

I stood up slowly, still in pain from my beating and sauntered up to him. I left barely an inch between us, taking his hands in mine as I met his dark eyes...

"It's our last night"

"Yeah"

"Maybe you can stay...here" I whispered and brushed my lips against his cheek.

"You sure?" he whispered back, looking down at me skeptically. I eased my lips over his again as a reply. His hands caressed my face and mine gripped the collar of shirt as we slowly shuffled back over to the cot. He fell back on to it, pulling me down on top of him and our lips barely even parting. His hands drifted over my back, then down my sides as they gripped the hem of my shirt for a moment before untucking it and running his hands underneath and all over me. My lips faltered for a second as his finger tips glided over my skin and sent goosebumps all over my body...

"Maybe we shouldn't" he darted his eyes away from mine and back on the door to the room, "Carter's gonna come back eventually"

"I'm optimistic he won't"

"I don't want my last night with you to be this" he answered honestly, "If I never see you again it'll hurt twice as much"

"Can you at least stay?"

"Of course" he stroked his finger tips over my cheek, brushing my hair back behind my ear again.

We didn't move the rest of the night and Carter never did come back...We stayed up late, most of the time just staring amusingly at each other. The other small moments he would kiss my lips or whisper something sweet in my ear...

He fell asleep first, unable to keep his eyes open any longer as they slowly drifted closed. I brushed my lips softly over his forehead,

"Goodnight Marcus"

I curled into him, letting my head rest against his chest and then closed my eyes tightly...

"Skylar, they're calling us to leave" Carter pushed back the door to the room...Me and Marcus were sitting up on my cot, I was gripping his hand in mine.

I didn't want to say goodbye.

Carter sort of stared for a moment then closed the door as he walked away from the room...leaving us alone again.

I looked up at Marcus, forcing back the tears that I knew were building in my eyes. Marcus held my other hand then pulled me up and into him, embracing me with his strong arms. It hurt my still bruised body but I let him hold me tight.

It was probably the last time he would get the chance to...

"Don't get yourself into too much trouble, okay?" he whispers as I cling to him tighter.

I didn't want to lose anyone else.

"I can't promise anything" I reply softly.

"Don't forget me when you become some big hot shot officer in Philly" he placed his hand beneath my chin and tilted my face up so that I looked at him. He gazed down at me with a charming smile and teasing eyes.

"That's doubtful"

My lips found their way over his, but only for a second...I knew any longer and I would be more and more tempted to screw orders and stay with him.

"I should go" I darted my eyes down towards my boots, letting my hands slip as I stepped away from him.

"Goodbye, freckles"

"Bye Marcus"

I couldn't help but look back up at him...My eyes met his at first but then drifted back down to his lips...

I moved back into him and slide my hands over his cheeks and around to the back of his neck, letting my fingers just grip the end of his hairline. Our lips molded firmly, without hesitation or any uncertainty despite our current circumstances.

And suddenly.

It all felt too soon...

"Marcus" I let our lips drift a part as I shifted my eyes away from his, "I have to go i'm sorry"

"We'll see each other again" he whispered and brushed his lips over my cheek,

"I'll make sure of it"

I threw him a small smile, but still keeping my eyes away from his when I pulled away again. Unable to bring myself to say goodbye again I walked towards the door. Glancing back at him, he wasn't smiling...his eyes watching me with longing as I turned away and walked out of the prison...

"What is Philly like?" I whispered to Carter as we walked slowly along the abandoned bridge.

"It's nothing special"

"It's your home"

"I never saw that place as my home"

"So then what do you see as your home?"

"Where ever I put my feet"

"Seems lonely"

"Not when my feet are next to yours"

"Oh, okay" I laughed but could only guess my cheeks were a nice bright red, "Nice. Do you use that pick up often?"

"Only on the really pretty girls" he winked at me. I had never seen Carter like this before...He was always so reserved and quiet, the only other time even even showed any real emotion was anger during our training...especially when it came to Roland.

"You are just awful"

"Aw thanks, Jones" he replied and smacked me hard on the back of my shoulder. His flat hand suddenly moved up over my shoulder and he gripped it tightly.

"What?" I asked even though I had put my eyes in front of us again. The wagon was making its way slowly over the bridge, and the rest of us trailing behind it. Including Jimmy who was just a few feet in front of me and Carter.

"How are you?"

"How am I?" I repeated confusingly, "Fine, I guess? Why?"

"I don't know..."

"You asked" I laughed again, turning back to look at him as his hand was sliding from my shoulder and falling back to his gun.

"Are _you_ okay?" I asked when he hadn't spoken again, "You seem a little...off"

"I'm probably just tired"

"Hey" I said, grabbing his uniform sleeve to stop him, "Is this about going to Philly?"

"I mean working for your father again and everything" I added when he looked back at me curiously. We stayed silent for a moment as Fry was passing us, then Carter finally spoke...

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Okay sure" I nodded.

"Why do you want to be militia?"

"What..."

"Its a simple enough question"

"You shouldn't ask things like that Carter you'll get us both in trouble" I practically yelled at him.

"Right...sorry" he grimaced, his face distorted in an almost disbelief. He stared for another moment then turned his attention back towards the caravan and began to walk onward.

_Why had I yelled?_

_I didn't mean it, it was a simple enough question..._

My head was aching, my fingers drifted over the burn scar on on my arm. I felt almost dizzy but I shook it off and ran to catch up to Carter.

"Sorry," I exclaimed when I came to walk beside him once more, "I think i'm just...a little tired too"

"No it's not that"

"What do you mean?"

"It's what they did to you"

"Carter"

He looked up to see Jimmy had stopped just in front of us, he was shaking his head "no" at Carter. I looked between the two of them curiously but neither of them spoke anymore as we continued forward. They walked on either side, the sudden silence was killing me and I couldn't take it anymore.

"What aren't you telling me?" I asked them both quietly as we grew closer to the wagon and the others again.

"Later" Carter looked down at me. He forced a sincere smile but his eyes were almost sorrowful. We continued to walk until the sun started to drift behind the trees then stopped to make camp, sticking to the side of the road. No one would bother to mess with a band of militia armed with guns.

It grew cold quickly with the disappearance of the sun and while the fabric of our uniforms were thick they wouldn't protect us with the rapidly dropping temperature.

"JONES! TYLER!" Captain Baker yelled, "Go collect fire wood!"

"Yes sir!" me and Jimmy chanted and headed out into the darkness with nothing but a small torch.

I held up the torch as we searched the ground for branches and twigs and anything we could find. I would pick them up and place them in Jimmy's arms,

"Nervous?" he asked suddenly when I threw a rather thick branch onto his arms and he almost dropped he entire pile.

"About what exactly"

"Philadelphia" he says as he readjusts the pile of wood in his arms before they could tumble out.

"No...you?"

"Maybe a little"

"You lying?"

"Okay _maybe_ a lot"

I smiled at him, "Think we got enough?"

"To keep fifteen people warm?" he shrugged, "probably not and we'll probably get yelled at but I don't think we can get much more"

"I'll grab some on the way back"

We turned back around and started towards camp, moving quickly since we'd probably get smacked around for taking so long.

"Well its about time ladies" Captain Baker exclaimed with an unamused glare, the soldiers from his unit snickering as he came to stand in front of us.

"Do you know what it takes to be a militia soldier?" he asked us.

"Ability to listen to orders sir" Jimmy replied, almost bracing himself for a punch.

"Efficiency" Captain Baker eyed Jimmy still unamused and still glaring,

"Dedication, willingness to do the job and get it done without acting like a bunch of pansies"

"Now go back out and get some more damn wood" he smacked the pile from Jimmy's hands and pointed back towards the hauntingly dark woods,

"Leave your guns and don't come back until you've picked up enough for this entire unit to warm their asses"

"Yes sir" we both chimed softly.

"Leave your side arms. Now go!"

We dropped our guns and ran back into the woods, I could hear the soldiers booming laughs as they echoed behind us...

"Do they seriously expect us to come back?"

"Why wouldn't we?" I asked as we started picking up wood again, no guns to protect us and no torch for light either...

"Are you joking Skylar?"

"I could ask you the same"

"We could do it you know, just run off before they sober up"

"What about Carter?"

"Does that mean you're saying you want to"

"No" I shook my head, "but if we were I wouldn't want to leave without him-"

"Why?"

"Because...he's our friend"

"He wouldn't leave"

"How do you know? And this is all still hypothetical right?" I laughed shakily,

"I mean we aren't actually gonna leave are we? That'd be insane..."

"Would it?"

"Yes" I scoffed, looking back at him wildly, "That's treason!"

"Skylar"

"What Jimmy?"

"You called me Jimmy" he smirked surprisingly.

"Get to your point, PL"

"Do you remember your family"

"Of course I do-"

"No...do you _really remember_"

I thought about it for a second...He was right I couldn't...

Not really.

Their faces were in my mind but they're blurred.

I couldn't remember what they sounded like.

I couldn't remember their names...

Every time I tried to focus on their faces, a sharp, blaring head ache stopped me abruptly.

"And that Skylar" he held my eyes firmly,

"Is what they did to you"


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8: CityOfBrotherlyLove&BrokenStars**

***James Carter Monroe* **

Those blue doors.

Those pale blue doors were like an aching bitter hell.

Of all things that had stayed the same.

I glanced slightly to my right and then to my left. Monroe had apparently deemed armed guards necessary when it came to escorting me to his office.

"Is this going to take long cause I got places to be" I snarked at the burly, dark skinned soldier to my left.

He ignored me, his dark eyes holding firmly on those pale blue doors.

I shrugged and rolled my eyes, then nudged the other guy with my elbow, "Not much of a talker is he?"

He didn't say anything either.

Soon enough the gates of hell opened wide to pull me into the wrath of the devil himself, Monroe. My armed guards shoved the tips of their guns into my back, pushing me forward and through the doors. They closed them quietly, leaving me standing there...with my father right before me.

"It's good to see you kid" he smiled almost sincerely...almost.

"Yeah _dad_" I huffed, trying to hold back my clenched fists as I glared back into his eyes, "I'm sure it is"

"Lt. Johnson has informed me that you've decided to cooperate"

"Yeah well, after three years of torture I decided Somerville wasn't a very healthy outlet for me"

He clenched his jaw, suppressing the instinctive action of smacking me across the face. He let my comment go, turning his back to me as he made his way over to the small cabinetry beside his desk that housed his alcohol.

"If I remember correctly you prefer whiskey" he commented tartly as he pulled out the bottle and two glasses,

"But then again you are three years sober and I wouldn't want to tarnish your track record"

"Was there something you wanted from me Sebastian or can I go get settled into the barracks?"

"You aren't taking your old room here?"

I laughed at his forced disappointment, "No i'd rather be with my unit"

"You mean you'd rather be with that girl...Jones right?"

I bit my tongue...my fists clenching at my sides even tighter as he continued to inspect my reaction.

"Don't think I don't know everything that went on with you back in Somerville, James"

"Johnson tells me she's one of the best fighters he's seen come out of a training camp in a long time" he continued, pouring himself another glass and swigging it done before going on,

"And he wasn't the only one giving me information"

He poured another glass then moved back behind his desk, but he didn't sit down as he looked over the papers strewn across the desk top.

"Roland" he suddenly spoke again, "Good soldier. He was your room mate for a time as you know"

"Roland?" I huffed angrily, "You had Roland _spying_ on me?"

"Yes and he proved to be rather useful"

I could only imagine what Roland spewed from his mouth about me to my own father...

"For the first two years of your sentence to Somerville you were erratic," he picked up a piece of paper from his desk and his eyes ran back and forth over it.

"Uncontrollable" he continued as he placed the paper back down, "Border line; _unmanageable_"

"What's your point"

"The point is after those two years Johnson told me something snapped in you" he replied, "You became quiet, distant. You were finally listening to orders"

"I still don't see a point to your recap of summer camp"

"Then that all changed back when _she_ came"

_She._

_He didn't even need to say her name..._

"What about her"

"You started to act up again. Lt. Johnson says you were questioning orders, beating up superior officers"

"Roland is no superior officer"

"He is now" he replies with a smug smile, "I can't take your actions lightly just because you're my son..."

"You're being demoted" he adds when all I do is stare back at him with a dirty glare.

"You can't be serious"

"Oh i'm very serious, James" he almost yelled, smacking his glass down onto his desk,

"I won't let this girl become a repeat of the past"

"This is nothing like that"

"So you say"

"She isn't some rebel. She's part of _your_ militia" I answered firmly, "If anything she might be good for me"

"If you can't cooperate-"

"I will"

"If you can't cooperate," he started again, ignoring the fact that I interrupted him, "then I'll be forced to take more...dire actions"

"If you mean you'll have to kill me than just say so" I walked forward towards the bar and poured myself a drink,

"I'm not five anymore I can take it"

Sebastian watched me wearily but with almost stern eyes. I spilled a little whiskey on the oak wood cabinet from shaky hands but ignored it as I turned back around to face him.

"I don't think you completely understand the seriousness of this situation" the corner of his mouth twitched as he clenched his jaw tight for a moment,

"If my men don't think I'm capable to handle my own son what will they think of my capability to run this republic?"

"I could give a rats ass about your position and your lust for power" I retorted, waving my hand that was gripping the glass at him then chugging it back.

"If they take me down James, they'll see you as a threat" he replied more calmly, "They'll take you down without hesitation if they believe you have any loyalty to me"

"Then i'll guess i'd have to show them I don't"

He started towards me slowly, his arms drifting behind him as he clasped his hands together behind his back. As he was only inches away he caught my eyes and held them firm,

"And could you do it James?" he whispered, his blue eyes slightly amused but his mouth still in a thin frown,

"If they handed you a gun and told you to put it to my head and pull the trigger. Could you do it?"

"No" I answered without any slight of hesitation, "No but not because you're my father. Because I never wanted this, to be a killer"

I put the glass back down on the cabinet without taking my eyes from his and continued,

"You made me that way. You brought me up as a killer"

The corner of his mouth twitched again.

"I never wanted this...I never wanted to become this but _you_ forced me into it"

"We do what we have to, to survive. It's all I ever wanted for you, was to not grow up sick hungry in the woods because we couldn't find food or to watch you die of hypothermia"

"Don't act like any of this, any of what you and Uncle Miles created was for _me_"

"I did it all for you, James"

"No" I shook my head, "You did it for yourself"

I didn't give him a chance to defend himself anymore as I stormed out of his office and out of Independence Hall. I wasn't going to let him take the chance to manipulate me into thinking he ever cared. I wasn't going to let him be a father to me.

Not now, not after all this time.

Not after everything he's done.

Not after everything I have done...

"Hey" Skylar smiled as I came up to the open door of her room, "Where have you been?"

"Monroe"

"Oh"

"Yeah"

Without even really thinking I plopped down on her bed next to her. Her legs were crossed and she was leaning against the wall. I sat down on the edge of the bed as to keep my muddy boots on the floor then I just let myself fall back. I ran my hands over my face and back through my hair and sighed.

"You wanna talk about it?" she asked softly. I removed my hands from my face and looked up at her, she was no longer smiling but looking down at me deep in concern. Smiling up at her I shook my head, "Not really"

She didn't say anything more about it as she just continued to stare for a moment...then suddenly she straightened out her legs and scooted herself forward. Letting her legs hang off the edge like mine as she laid back next to me.

"You know" she turned her head to the side to look at me again, "There's an extra bed right over there if you haven't claimed a room yet"

"You asking me to be your roommate Jones?" I turned my head and smirked wildly.

"Maybe" she smiled, "I just got so used to you being right across from me for so long that...I don't know"

"It would be weird if I wasn't there"

"I don't think i'd be able to sleep" she nodded with a small smile, "And besides, Jimmy snores"

"So you asked him then too?"

"I was only going to if you say no"

"Then i'll save you and say yes"

"I appreciate it" her eyes danced with amusement before she turned them back towards the ceiling.

"You nervous?"

"About what"

"Well...Neville is our commanding officer now"

"Right" she cringed slightly, "that..."

"Hey"

All I had to do was stretch out my fingers slightly to take her hand in mine since we were so close. Her eyes turned back on mine, half her face buried by the blanket she had beneath her head...

"You'll be fine" I whispered. One corner of her mouth tilted up in a small, thankful smile and she squeezed my hand before closing her eyes. She took a deep breath, inching closer to me so she could put her head against my shoulder.

She cringed away slightly when she came close, "You smell like whiskey, Carter"

"When did you have time to go get a drink?" she laughed.

"Monroe's office" I answered, surprised that she was able to notice the light hint of the bitter drink on my breath.

"Oh...well then that's understandable"

"We should get going" I rose to look out the window beside her bed, "We have to go meet Neville soon"

She groaned and threw her hands over her face. I grabbed her hands, pulling her so she sat up with me. She threw me a look of dread and disgust, her eyes almost pleading with me to not go...

"Come on, just stay by me and you'll be fine" I tried to reassure her. But it didn't seem to help as she reluctantly pulled on her boots and moved as slowly as possible.

We met Jimmy as we were heading out of the barracks, which were just the old brick apartment buildings along main street. We headed up the cobbled streets of Philly and towards the cities own training center. We were supposed to be meeting Neville there so he could "induct" us into his unit.

"Johnson said he _specifically asked for me_" she nervously twisted her fingers together,

"What if...what if its to get revenge or something?"

"If he touches you i'll break his fat neck"

"Carter no" she pleaded, "I can't let you get in trouble for me"

"Don't you worry about me" I replied, "If he does anything to you. _Anything_. I want you to promise you'll tell me"

"Carter-"

"Promise me Skylar"

"I promise"

"Carter's right" Jimmy said, "If he does touch you let me know so I can throw in my own punches"

"You guys are either the bravest or the stupidest people i've ever met"

"The second one" I smiled.

"Yeah maybe you for" Jimmy winked at her and ducked when I swung my fist in his direction.

"Watch where you swing those guns, you almost hit me"

"Yeah next time i'll try harder"

"You two are hopeless" Skylar rolled her eyes but I saw the hint of a smile spreading as she turned her face away from us.

When we got to the training yard we could already see Fry standing with a small crowd of militia soldiers, about ten or fifteen of them bunched together.

"Ah! Tyler, Monroe, and...Jones. Glad you could finally join us"

I looked down at Skylar, I could see her entire body shaking so I grabbed her hand and held it tightly. She couldn't bring herself to look at me as she just continued to stare down at her boots...not wanting to meet Neville's eyes either. Neville's face came into view over the heads of the men, some of whom and Fry included, were taller than even myself. Neville must have stepped on a box of some sort as he popped up, standing tall and straight as he looked over our faces.

"Today, those of you who are new will be receiving your weapons" his voice carrying over us. He wasn't yelling or anything but it was loud enough to make Skylar cringe even when she couldn't bring herself to look at him.

"The rest of you have a nice day off" he continued and those who were already part of his unit flocked towards the bars...leaving me, Skylar, Jimmy, Fry and another boy who had at first been hidden by the crowd but I now recognized as Jason, Neville's own son.

Neville jumped down from the short wooden step stool he had been standing on and walked over to the five of us. I let go of Skylar's hand before he caught sight of it intwined in hers and she finally looked up to meet his eyes. But he wasn't looking at her...he was staring at me.

"To be honest when I found out you'd be joining my unit I couldn't have been more worried" he huffed with a slight raise of his eyes brows as he looked me up and down,

"But then I thought this could be fun. Your father as given me strict orders in that I can treat you anyway I please"

His somewhat disinterested expression turned smug as he moved his attention to Skylar,

"As for you, I've been waiting for this for a very long time Ms. Jones"

She was about to reply but I pinched her arm to stop her...By the look on her face whatever she had to say it wasn't going to be pleasant...which just meant it come back around to bite her in the ass...

"Have something to say Jones?" Neville smirked in satisfaction.

"No" she replied cooly, taking my hint to shut the hell up before she said anything she'd regret.

"I thought so"

Neville wasted no time as he shoved the guns into our hands. A nine mil. to keep in a side holster then some heavy automatic that needed a strap to throw over our shoulder just to help us hold them up and steady. Skylar was a bit overwhelmed by it and it didn't help with Neville barking at her the entire time. She had only ever been use to the small bb guns they gave us back in Somerville to practice with. Neville could see the uncertainty in her eyes but that just motivated her to toughen up. If told to at that moment she probably could have shot a target a good distance away and hit the middle red dot every time. After giving us the guns Neville waved us off. There was no mission for us, not yet anyway. So we all got ready to head back to our rooms.

Neville already strutting back down towards the bars with Jason following closely behind.

Jason didn't even acknowledge my existence...We'd had been friends before, it was more like brothers actually. He was younger than me, a year younger than Skylar.

But we were...had been close. Though I suppose Neville saw it fit to change that when he found out I was coming back...or maybe it had just been the three years I was gone...or what I had done to earn those three years in hell...

"Carter"

I looked back at Jimmy and he was nodding at Skylar...I glanced over and she was just sort of staring at the gun in her hands.

"Hey Skylar" I said calmly, "Why don't we head back to the room. You look pretty tired"

"Yeah...right" she just nodded without taking her eyes from the gun. We headed back towards the barracks and as soon as we got into the security of our room, she let her feelings about seeing Neville again come out all at once. She started to go into some sort of panic attack, her breathing was strained as she started to sob.

"Skylar, look at me" I whispered, grabbing her shoulders tightly as I tried to steady her trembling body,

"Look at me..."

"Okay, good. Now take a deep breath in..."

"Out...good"

She continued to cry uncontrollably, I thought she was going to collapse so I wrapped my arms around her to hold her up.

"Hey...you're okay"

"I looked into his face and all I could see was him bleeding out on the ground" she sobbed into my shirt, clenching it between her shaky fingers.

"I just...remembered everything"

"I'm sorry"

She pulled away slightly as she wiped her tear filled eyes on her sleeve. Looking up at me she stared curiously for a moment then her eyes drifted away from mine, landing on her hand that was still twisted in my shirt.

"You kinda remind me of him" she says as her other hand moved back up to grip my shirt again. I also noticed she still couldn't bring herself to say his name.

"Is that a good thing?"

"Yeah...yeah it is" she gave a small sigh and rested her head against my shoulder.

"You're warm..." she whispered softly after a a few minutes. Her hysterics gone and her tears were subsiding but I could still feel her body trembling as I continued to hold her up.

"If you're cold I can give you my jack-"

"No" she interrupted quickly, "No...it's fine"

I smiled and rested my head against hers and closed my eyes. It was nerve racking having her body pressed so firmly against mine, my hands fitting against the contours of her waist...I tried not to hold her so tight, my arms criss crossing along her back. But she didn't seem to mind the compactness of it. It almost seemed she preferred it that way, for whenever I loosened my grip a little she would press harder against me...

"We have patrol over at the south gate tonight" I whispered, trying to keep my mind away from an image I kept playing over and over again in my head...

One where i'd lean in and kiss her...

"Is Neville gonna be there" she asked without pulling away.

"No, Jones" I let out a small laugh, "no he's not"

"Good" she whispered and sighed again.

"Carter?" she looked up at me, only just barely pulling her body away from mine.

"Yeah?"

She looked at me a little longer than bit her lip back, "Never mind" she mumbled through clenched teeth and then pulled away completely.

"You sure..."

"N-"

"Yes i'm sure"

"Hey, you okay now or..."

"Yeah" she smiled and wiped her eyes on her sleeve one last time, "I'm okay...thanks"

I put my hand over her cheek, letting my thumb stroke absentmindedly over her skin.

And thats as brave as I got.

"How's your scar healing?" I asked, dropping my hand from her cheek and taking her hand tightly in mine. I lifted up her arm and turned it over gently, running my finger tips softly over the emblem burned into her wrist.

"Good"

"Does it hurt"

"No, not anymore"

"I don't think I've ever told you this but...you're pretty brave, Jones"

"You're saying that to the girl who was just balling her eyes out a few minutes ago"

"You're brave for a lot of reasons" I reply, my fingers still tracing the emblem,

"One of them being that you aren't afraid to show vulnerability. People think in order to be brave they have to act emotionless...like stone...but sometimes the braver person is the one that lets go of that stone exterior. It just reminds us that everyone is human, no one can be completely fearless"

"What about you" she met my eyes, "Are you brave that way too?"

"Well, like I told you back in Somerville...i'm a coward"

"I don't think you are"

"You don't know me that well"

"I know enough" she retorted, "You were the only one who stood up for me back in training"

"To be honest with you, I had hoped for a different out come in doing that"

She looked up at me sadly. "What you said a couple months ago about rather taking the bullet"

Her eyes holding mine steadily, "I don't want to think what it would be like without you, Carter"

"Didn't realize you cared so much"

"We're friends" she replied, "Of course I care"

If I didn't know any better it almost sounded like her voice broke on the word friends...like she wanted to say something else but stopped herself.

"Yeah...yeah we're friends"

After grabbing dinner the three of us...me, Skylar and Jimmy...headed towards the south gate. It would take us at least half an hour just to get there. The sun already having gone down, the trees towering over us were like erie shadows against the low light of our torches. We moved slowly, carrying our heavy weaponry in our arms.

"It's weird right" Skylar suddenly remarked.

"What?" Jimmy asked turning to glance at her.

"Marcus not being with us" she answered, her eyes darting down to her hands. They were twitching over the strap of her gun as it was pressed tightly against her chest.

"You'll see him again" I told her reassuringly but my eyes would have told her otherwise so I kept them looking ahead.

"What makes you say so" Jimmy asked me.

"Units cross more then you'd think" was my reply. The woods started to thin out, the dirt road we followed turning into a slight bend around the forests edge.

Skylar didn't say anymore about Marcus...And just mentioning it I now couldn't stop thinking about the way she had kissed him back at the prison...

"Do you think we'll ever go out on a mission" Jimmy sighed over dramatically.

"Soon enough" I reply, "but trust me you don't want to go out on missions they aren't exactly fun"

"I just want to see some action" Jimmy shrugs, "its better then standing around, guarding a fence no one could possibly get through anyway"

"We have to monitor the people and supplies that come through" I argue back, looking up at the dark sky for a moment.

"Yeah whatever"

We finally made it to the gate, the guards there before us running back down the path towards the inner city as we set up for the night. Like the other gates into Philly, it was literally just a tall gate built into the fence. The doors were swung open but with our fire power no one causing a threat would make it close enough without getting shot down.

There wasn't much to do but stand and watch the pitch black darkness ahead of us. The only things keeping us warm were the clothes on our backs and the tiny fire the previous guards had built that was already starting to dwindle. We stuck our torches into the small pit then Jimmy settled in against the fence, his gun resting in his lap.

"Wake me if anything interesting happens" he muttered as he closed his eyes. Skylar glanced up at me and rolled her own deep blues, I smiled and she smiled back.

"So you aren't even a little happy to be home?" she asked still smiling.

"Well, if I have to face Philly and my father I'm at least glad I have you and Jimmy"

"Thats not what I asked" she said sternly.

"I know" I nodded and smirked at her.

"So you aren't then. Not even a little?"

"Not even a little"

"That's sort of depressing, Carter"

"I don't mind so much"

"I think you do" she says and grows closer to me, glancing back at Jimmy as if to check that he's really sleeping.

"Is that what you're afraid of?" she asked quietly, "feeling too safe, making this place your home?"

"Its not a great place to call home" I reply, whispering now that she was just inches. Her eyes moved all over my face, then suddenly she tilted her head towards the sky and smiled.

"What?" I asked looking up along with her.

"It's nice to see the stars again"

The grey clouds that had lingered over our heads all day with the threat of snow were now just breaking up...the small tiny dots of light shining through against the deep blue sky had caught her eye and I suspected she wouldn't want to look away until the sun rose again.

"You're..." I couldn't think of a word that could do her justice as I watched her face brighten with joy while her eyes darted all over the never ending sky.

"I don't know Skylar Jones"

She drew her eyes away and back on mine and she smiled so brightly up at me it ached my heart.

"I wish I had a telescope" she gave a small laugh, "my mother use to have this big telescope and we'd take it out into the fields in the summer. We'd sit there for hours just gazing..."

"What?" I asked as I watched the smile fade from her face.

"My father, I just remembered...he broke it after she died"

Skylar smiled to reassure me that she was okay. But her eyes were sad and longing for her mother as she tilted her head back to look at the stars again.

We were on patrol for another five hours. It was utterly cold despite sitting by the fire and two hours before getting off, snow had started to fall heavily.

"You've got to be kidding me" Jimmy's teeth chattered and Skylar grabbed his arm and pulled him in closer to her.

"Stop being such a baby"

"How are you not freezing your ass off?" Jimmy's eyes went wide and his brows furrowed, "You're just skin and bones"

"No..." Her eyes darted down over her body.

"You're pretty muscular for a girl though" Jimmy commented as he stared at her a little longer,

"But not like in a gross way like those women who use to body build back in the day"

"I would hope not" she scrunched her nose in disgust then looked up at me.

"Don't ask me, I'm not getting into this"

"I wasn't gonna" she shrugged and looked away.

"Right" I smirked, even though she didn't see.

"Besides you're pretty skinny yourself there" I remarked to Jimmy.

"Yeah you ass that's probably why i'm here shaking like crazy and you look like you're enjoying a damn sauna"

"It's called layering, PL"

Now I knew why the previous guards had left in such a hurry. But even then they at least had the falling sun to warm them...we had the small pitiful fire which they left behind and we couldn't go out for more wood for because it was agains 'protocol'...something to remember for next time then.

When our shift ended and we were replaced by the next guards the three of us ran as fast as we could go with the heavy guns in our arms. It was still pretty early, about two thirty by the time we got back to the barracks. Going inside was definitely a welcoming relief...it wasn't a toasty warm like I hoped but definitely not as bad as it could be if we were still outside. Jimmy took off down the hall towards his room as me and Skylar made our way to the second floor where our room was. Climbing the stairs was twice as exhausting, and we were already tired from having run all the way back. I ended up taking Skylar's gun from her despite her grunts of reluctance. She hated being babied but she was too tired to argue more and only threw me more grunts of disapproval. When we got to the room I dropped the guns to the floor and we both collapsed on our beds.

"I will...never get...use to that" she sighed, her breath was heavy and her eyes already closed as she laid unmoving, not even bothering with the high laces of her boots as she just left them on. I sat up after I could catch my breath and started to pull off my boots, letting them fall to the floor and splatter melted snow over the cold hard wood.

"You can't sleep in wet clothes" I told her, "You'll get sick"

"Hm" she groaned and didn't move. I shook my head and got up, moving across the floor and over to her. I started unlacing her boots then pulled them off, her socks were still dry so I left them on for her.

"What are you doing?" she muttered, still not opening her eyes or moving even as I started unbuckling the thick black belt around her waist.

"Like I said you'll get sick" I scolded lightly, "So do you want me to continue or can you muster some strength to do it yourself?"

"Can you just do it?" she waved her hand at me.

"You sure about that"

"No" she opened her eyes and stared up at me for a moment before pushing my hand off her belt.

"All right, all right" she sighed and stood up slowly. I moved back over to my bed and turned away from her as we both changed out of our drenched uniforms.

I left my boxers on and pulled on a dry grey tee. I looked back to see her just as she was crawling under the blankets, only in her underwear and a long sleeved shirt.

"Sure you're gonna be warm enough?"

"Sure you are?" she mustered up a smirk and nodded down at my boxers.

"Well, if I get too cold I can just crawl in with you" I teased as I slid underneath my own blankets.

"_Cute_" she rolled her eyes back at me.

I watched her even as she closed her eyes to go to sleep...falling asleep along with her...


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: BurnMarks&BrokenMemories **

***Skylar Jones***

He was right...I wasn't nearly warm enough. I could hear his light snores, I had been use to them by now that they didn't bother me...But at least they told me he was asleep.

I looked over at his dark outline, he was still facing me...and I gave in. I wrapped my own blanket around my shoulders and rose from the bed, tip toeing across the cold floor over to Carter. I pushed back his blanket slightly and because he was such a light sleeper he had already woken up before I even crawled in next to him.

"What the hell are you doing" he rubbed his tired eyes then squinted in the darkness to look at me.

"I'm cold, now scoot over"

"There's barely room as it is"

"Then scoot _closer_"

He sighed, I could practically hear his eyes roll at me as I moved in next to him.

"You're from New England. How do you not know how to dress more warmly at night?" he whispered as I pulled my arms in and pressed myself against him.

"Shut up" I whispered back and rested my head against his shoulder, "You know you're enjoying this"

"Damn straight, Jones" his body shook slightly as he laughed, "But I wasn't going to say anything"

"Just don't fall in love with me"

"Too late"

I whipped my head up, "You're just joking right"

"Can't tell can you?" he winked.

Now I was the one rolling eyes.

"Go to sleep before I decide this isn't fun and kick you back to freeze in your own bed"

"Goodnight, Carter" I smiled and shut my eyes.

"Night, Jones"

As hard as I tried I couldn't sleep anyway...I couldn't get the image of Chris out of my head.

His eyes...as they froze, pointed towards the sky...

"Skylar"

I tilted my head back to see Carter was awake now, his eyes squinting as they adjusted to the bright light now coming in through the window.

"At least it's not snowing anymore" he had pushed himself up with his hands to peer out the window. He looked back down at me and smiled, but it faded when I didn't smile back.

"You okay?"

"Yeah i'm...still tired" I pulled my blanket tighter around me and rose from his bed. Goosebumps spread all over my body. The air felt crisp and icy, I could even see my own breath as I took a deep breath then dropped the blanket. I quickly grabbed the pants from my spare uniform and pulled them on, almost tripping on the pants leg as I jumped around to pull them up.

"Still cold, Jones?" Carter was laughing at me with the most wicked smile on his face.

"Shut up" I stuck my tongue out at him as I pulled the zipper and buttoned them closed. He just continued to smile at me as he got out of bed to change as well. I glanced up at him as I was pulling on my boots. He reached back and gripped his tee shirt, pulling it over his head and tossing onto the floor. He turned his back to me as he reached down and grabbed his pack...There were long, thin scars all over his back. Each one almost reaching all the way across the expanse of his back, criss crossing this way and that...

Almost like he had been whipped.

I got up from the edge of my bed and walked over to him, "Your back"

"They're old" he said softly. I dragged my finger tips gently over his skin, it was a strange texture between the roughness of the old scars and the soft, warm feel of his healthy skin. His muscles had tensed up at first when my fingers met his back, but now they relaxed as I continued to stroke my fingers over his spine.

"How have I never noticed? Were you purposely hiding them from me?" I questioned slightly frantically, "Who did this to you?"

"Geez Skylar, calm down" he looked back at me, "...They did...Johnson and my father"

"Why?"

"Do they really need a reason to do anything when it comes to me"

"You must have done something"

His eyes turned cold as he glared down at me, "Why do you assume that_ I _did something wrong?"

"Why else would they flog you?"

His back tensed up again so I pulled my hand away, "Sorry...I didn't mean..."

"It's okay" he shook his head, "It doesn't matter anymore"

I backed away as he pulled a new shirt over his head, then grabbed his dark blue militia shirt and slipped his arms through. He turned around to face me as he buttoned up the uniform, his eyes holding mine with a stern curiosity.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" he asked.

"Like what?"

"Like i'm some lost little puppy"

"Sorry..."

I turned away from him, going back to my own pack and shifting through it to grab my militia shirt. I pushed my arms slowly through the sleeves, my fingers drifted over the buttons mindlessly then I tucked the hem into my pants before shoving my belt around my waist. I turned back around to see him staring at me, his blue eyes sad and uncertain.

"What"

"How's your scar?"

"Why do you keep asking me that"

"Do you remember getting it, Skylar"

"Of course I do"

"What did it feel like when they stuck hot iron into your skin" he moved closer to me, so that he was looking down into my eyes.

"Close your eyes"

"Why?"

"Just do it, Jones"

I stared up at him angrily but did as he said, shutting my eyes with a loud irritated _huff_. I felt his fingers clasp around my wrist, right over my burn mark. He lifted my arm up and pulled me in close to him.

"Remember how scared you were...they dragged you from the cell. They strapped you down to that cold metal table"

Carter's voice was low and soft, I could feel his breath brush my skin as he leaned in to whisper.

"You probably kicked and thrashed to fight back"

"Carter-"

"No, just think about it. Remember"

I heard a small clicking sound, "What is that-"

"Keep your eyes closed" he scolded, "do you remember the heat...before it even touched your skin"

There was a heat resonating presence by over my burn mark, I tried to pull my arm away but Carter gripped it tighter.

"Skylar it's important that you remember"

An image of Lt. Johnson flashed across my mind...an malicious smirk sweeping over his face as he dug the hot iron into my wrist...

I felt my skin burn again and I cried out.

The sound of something small and hard like metal hit the floor and I felt Carter's arms move around me as he embraced me tightly. I didn't cry much, a few tears ran down my cheeks as I mostly just clung to him.

"You're okay" he whispered softly, "You're safe"

I opened my eyes and glanced down to the ground, laying by his boot was a small lighter...

"Did you burn me?" I tilted my head up and looked at him.

"The flame didn't even touch your skin"

"But I felt-"

"You were just remembering, Jones" he brushed his fingers over my cheek, "Besides, i'd never do that to you"

"Why"

"Skylar you have to know...These people, they aren't your family" his sad eyes lingered over mine, "They could care less about what happens to you"

"But you do"

"Listen, if you chose to run, i'll understand" he said, "But if you chose to stay...you have to know what you're getting into"

"If I run...I could see my family again"

"No Skylar" he shook his head, "That's where they'll look, you'll just be putting them in danger"

"But-"

"If you run you can't go back to your old life"

"But if I stay..."

"If you stay...I can't guarantee you'll have a new life to start"

Neville had us working in the training yard and in the stables. He seemed to have it out for me, making me work twice as hard, and twice as long.

If he didn't think I was doing something right, like cleaning a saddle or gun, he would make me do it again and again until he was completely satisfied.

Which he never was.

"I smell like horse shit" I grunted when we walked into our room after hours of torturous work. I plopped down on my bed right away and started pulling off my boots.

"We'll get a mission soon" Carter tried to reassure me,

"Neville doesn't like to hang around for too long" he told me, "He lives for having authority over people, any way he can get it"

"Wanna grab a drink later?" Carter asked after a moment of watching me grumble and mutter things I could have easily been flogged for,

"There's this little bar down the street that isn't too bad and not as popular"

"You asking me out, James?"

"As a friend" he smiled.

"I would go with you, if I drank"

"First time for everything" he shrugged, still smiling widely at me.

"All right, I'm in" I nodded, "See if Jimmy wants to join us"

"Of course. I gotta run though"

"Where are you going?"

"Dinner...with my father" he cringed slightly as he grabbed his dark green, brown leather trimmed jacket which was given to us. All soldiers wore them, but they were large and heavy and I'd rather be a little cold then wear something so constricting.

"Do you have too?" I asked seeing the displeasure in his face as he scrunched his nose.

"I don't have a choice"

"You can just say no"

"I wish it was that easy" he gave a small smile again, "I'll see you later"

"Don't get yourself into trouble"

"I'll try but I can't promise anything" he called back as he headed quickly out the door. I slept off the long morning curled beneath the covers of my bed. When I woke Carter still wasn't back yet, I grabbed a small wash towel and headed towards the small bathroom in the tiny apartment. We had a wash basin set up with clean water, I splashed the cold water over my tired face then tried to scrub the horse smell off me. I rubbed my skin till it was red then went back out into the open room. Carter was just coming in as I rummaged through my pack for a hair tie.

"Good to see you survived it" I commented as he threw himself down onto the bed.

"Barely" he muttered as he covered his face and groaned into his hands. I combed my hair back with my fingers and pulled it into a pony tail and tied it off with a rubber band. Then moved over and plopped down beside Carter and curled my arm around his.

"Hey" I whispered, turning my head to the side to look at him. "Still wanna grab that drink?"

"More than anything" he smiled back at me. Carter jerked forward, pulling me up and out the door as we headed out of the barracks and into the cold night air.

"Here" he said, taking the glass from the man behind the bar and handing it to me.

"What is it?" I asked looking at the golden-brown liquid skeptically as I swirled it around.

"Just try it, Jones" Carter said after already downing his glass. The small bar wasn't crowded, there were only two other soldiers sitting a few stools down from us. It was quiet except for the clinking of glasses as the bartender moved back and forth, and the small mindless chatter between the other soldiers. They were much older than me and Carter, they didn't seem to mind that we were there or even showed any sign that they caredwe were there. I put the edge of the glass to my lips and hesitated before chugging it down. It had a strange, bitter taste and burned on the way down. He laughed as I coughed violently, placing the glass back down on the counter and shaking my head.

"Do you hate me, Carter?" I spewed out between coughs.

"You'll get use to it"

"I don't think I want to"

The bar tender was pouring Carter another, but I waved my hand no as he came to me. The man placed the bottle back in front of Carter, then made his way back towards the other soldiers.

"You wanna talk about it"

"About what"

"Whatever's got you going for that third drink"

"That's what the drinking's for" he replied, lifting the glass up to his lips, "So I don't have to talk about it"

I just watched him silently as he continued to empty glass after glass. Carter wasn't exactly an open book...hell, it had taken him almost a month before he even talked to me and we had shared a cell together.

That day, the first time he had spoken to me...the day I got the emblem burned into my skin...

"_The pain goes away quicker than you'd think_" he had said.

I don't know anymore if he had just been wrong, or he had just been trying to reassure me but...the pain still hadn't gone away.

Physically I was fine of course.

Mentally...

It was hard to tell.

"You not gonna have any more?" Carter slurred out as he threw back his. I had lost count of how many he had but the bottle was starting to grow dangerously close to almost empty...

"Not really my taste"

"Then what is?" he asked grabbing the bottle to pour himself another but missed the glass and spilled some of it on top of the counter.

"Water" I replied then grabbed the bottle from him, "All right I think you've had enough"

He tried to grab the bottle back from me but just let his hand drop to his side instead, "Not nearly"

"Let's get you back to the room"

I got down from the stool and carefully pulled Carter with me, wrapping my arm around his waist for support. I grabbed his arm with my other hand and draped it around my neck, moving my fingers down to tightly grip his hand as I led him out of the bar.

We walked...well I practically dragged him...slowly down the street and back towards the barracks. Carter leaned his head against my shoulder as I pulled him out of the road and onto the sidewalk.

"No one likes me" he sighed heavily, "My own father doesn't love me"

"I'm sure that's not true"

"You don't know Sky" he slurred and stumbled on his feet slightly, "You don't know"

"Well I like you, Carter" I told him and smiled, "I hope that-"

He stopped walking and suddenly I felt his lips on mine.

It was like everything slowed down...My body froze but my lips didn't as they moved against his gently and I let him kiss me. His breath was warm, and tasted of the bitter drink that had burned my throat before. But I didn't mind which surprised me most of all...His hands moved over to caress my cheeks and I felt his tongue cross my lips slightly before he pulled away. Even after our lips parted I was too in shock to even move as I just stared wide eyed up at him.

"I like you too, Jones" he smiled goofily then collapsed.

I stayed by his side all night.

Luckily a soldier had been walking down the side walk opposite us and saw Carter as he collapsed. The soldier helped me get him back to our room...I thanked him but realized after he had left I never asked him his name. He had helped me set Carter down on his bed, I was sitting next to him now and stroking my fingers back through his hair. He had slept through the night, his snores filling the room as I stayed awake to make sure he wouldn't throw up in his sleep and choke...Now bringing back small flashes of memories.

Those of my father who would stumble in late at night, drunk and angry...It was strange, it had just flowed back into my mind so quickly It felt I had just gotten a head rush, like if I had jumped up too quickly or had stared into a bright light for too long then looked away quickly...

"What am I going to do with you?" I sighed, my fingers still gliding through his thick hair which he was starting to let grow out. I got up and grabbed some of our clean water, bringing it over to him I lifted his head and sat behind him. Pulling him up so that he leaned back against me I lightly smacked his cheek.

"Come on Carter, you have to wake up"

He groaned and grunted, his eyes flickering open and squinting tiredly as he looked up at me.

"I feel sick" he moaned and I forced him to drink the whole glass of water.

"Binge drinking will do that to you"

"That much used to be nothing for me"

"Yeah three years ago, Carter"

"I guess it's been a while"

"Why do you need to drink?" I asked him, now stroking my finger tips over his forehead gently.

"Because it's the only thing I can control"

"Doesn't look like it from here" I retorted and he just stared blankly for a moment before speaking again, his voice low and still slightly slurred.

"Why do I remember kissing you"

"Probably because you did"

"Oh uh...sorry"

"You were drunk" I kept my eyes on his, "It's okay"

"Did you at least punch me after?" he asked, "I would have deserved that"

"You sort of collapsed after" I answered.

"You can punch me now if you want"

I just smiled and shook my head at him, "The hangover you're gonna have to deal with will be enough for me"

He laughed but then his face twisted in a painful grimace as he held his head in his hands.

"I'm already enjoying this" I laughed down at him and he looked back up at me in pain.

"I'm so glad"

"You should drink some more water"

I got up, leaving him to sulk on his bed as I filled the glass again and brought it over to him.

"Drink all of it" I told him as he swung his legs over the side of the bed and I sat beside him again.

"I wasn't a perv or anything was I?"

"What do you mean?"

"I didn't try and feel you up or something..." he asked more hesitantly as I took the empty glass from him and placed it on the bedside table.

"No you didn't feel me up, Carter"

"Good"

"Now I know to never go drinking with you again" I nudged him with my elbow, "At least not without Jimmy"

"That would be smart" he threw me a small smile but then darted his eyes quickly away from mine...like he was still ashamed for kissing me...

"You aren't going to be weird around me now are you?" I asked skeptically leaning forward so I could try and look him in the eye.

"I could say the same to you" he laughed and met my gaze. I held it for a moment before smiling at him again, "We should find Jimmy before we head out"

"Right...Neville" he nodded, "How are you doing with that by the way?"

"Struggling to hold myself back from punching him in his smug face"

"Just don't show that he's getting to you" his eyes blinked in concern, "That's what he wants"

"I'm starting to remember things", my voice was just a small, quiet squeak as I tried to hold back tears.

"That's because of you, Carter"

"Is that a good thing"

"I'm not so sure yet" I answered, picturing again my father stumbling home drunk those first few years after my mom died.

"Well let me know when you figure it out so I can remind you to thank me"

"I can now" I smiled. With my hand gripping his shoulder tightly I leaned in and gently kissed his cheek, "Thank you Carter"

He turned his head before I could pull away, the side of his nose brushing up against mine as his eyes stared curiously at me. His breath mingling with mine I could practically taste the hint of whiskey that was still lingering in his mouth...

"We should go" Carter darted his eyes away and rose from the bed, my hand slipping away from his shoulder as he did. We pulled our boots on and headed out towards the stables, walking in silence...Every once in a while I could see him steal a glance at me but I didn't turn to look back as I pretended not to notice. We were the first ones (for once) to get to the stable. We waited, leaning up against one of the empty stalls.

"What do you think he's gonna make us suffer through today?"

"More pointless chores probably" Carter muttered, rubbing his forehead.

"How do you feel?"

"Like I could swallow an entire bottle of pain killers and it wouldn't have any effect"

"If only" I smirked and shook my head at him.

"One thing I miss most since the blackout; Advil" he smiled back.

"I can live without it"

"Is there anything you miss then?"

"Ice cream"

He tilted his head slightly and just smiled amusingly down at me.

"What?"

"Nothing" he continued to smile as we waited the rest of the time in silence...


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: Harrisburg&BrokenPieces **

***Skylar Jones***

"Some of our spies have led us to a rebel unit holding up in Harrisburg. There's been talk that they plan to make their way here to assassinate General Monroe and Matheson" Neville talked calmly, his voice steady and firm as he looked us over. "We are to head there and dispose of these rebels as quickly and quietly as possible"

"I will only be requiring a small team go in. Monroe wants this done without the knowledge of Harrisburg's citizens"

Neville scanned over our faces in silence for a moment, then landed his eyes on Carter.

"Monroe" he called, "you'll be running point"

"Shouldn't that be your job...sir"

"I will not be going on this little mission" he replied, "there are other important things that need doing"

"And my team, sir"

"Jason, Fry, Jimmy boy and Ms. Jones"

"Your father would like to meet with us to go over the details now" Neville smirked, "the rest of you are dismissed"

I looked wearily up at Carter. He looked slightly confused but also angry about all this. He caught my eye and just nodded, "I'll meet you back at the barracks"

I nodded and headed back with Jimmy...I kept glancing back nervously and he was watching us walk away.

"Come on, Skylar" Jimmy pulled me to walk faster, "he'll be fine"

Jimmy waited with me in our room...we were silent. I was too worried about Carter being alone with his father again and Jimmy could see it on my face. I shot up straight when Carter came back...he was quiet and slowly sat on the edge of his bed, running his hands over his face before looking at me and Jimmy.

"We leave first thing tomorrow"

Jimmy nodded, lightly patting me on the back of my shoulder before walking out of the room. I never took my eye from Carter, trying to read his face as he stared back at me.

"You okay"

"Yeah"

"I don't believe you"

"Why not"

"Because you're trying too hard to hide it"

"I didn't know that was possible"

I got up and sat next to him, turning my head as he turned his to glance at me.

"Are you ever going to tell me what happened that could make your father send you to Somerville"

"No"

"Don't you trust me?"

"It has nothing to do with trust" his eyes went cold and he clenched his jaw as if to hold back something he was about to tell me.

"Carter"

"Skylar"

"Is it really that bad"

"Worse"

"And why can't you tell me?"

"I don't want you to think badly of me" he whispered, darting his eyes away from mine and down to his hands.

"I won't"

"You will" he closed his eyes tight, his expression a painful grimace as he remembered whatever it was that he did.

"You just have to trust me on that"

"Okay" I placed my hand on top of his and gripped them for a second before pulling my hand back, "So what about this mission?"

"I'll explain later...i'm tired"

"We have patrol after lunch"

"Wake me ten minutes before we have to leave?"

"Yeah sure"

I got up from his bed and settled into my own. I watched him crawl beneath his blanket, his back to me and soon enough I could hear his snores. I thought about the other night...how he had kissed me and barely even remembered it. Was I supposed to just pretend like it didn't mean anything?

He was drunk sure but it certainly felt real enough...the way his lips collided with mine...how his hands caressed my cheeks...

Was I supposed to just go on like there was nothing between us?

Because honestly I now couldn't be sure what we were. But I can't bring myself to shift and separate all these feelings, there was too much going on now with the mission and everything Carter was trying to help me remember. Now understanding why he was helping me remember in the first place.

But I couldn't deal with this now.

I didn't have room for a relationship, not in this life.

Then there was Marcus. Who I sort of promised to wait for...But when we parted, the feeling in my gut told me i'd never see him again.

And I still believe that.

I sat and stared at the wall for the next hour and a half. Trying to remember a time when things weren't so screwed to hell. Where the only things I had to worry about were avoiding Chris O'Leary's hands when ever they tried to find their way to my hips or getting an earful from my father when I didn't finish my chores. I looked again at Carter and rose to wake him up for patrol.

"Carter," I gripped his shoulder and shook him, "get your ass out of bed"

"You know," he mumbled turning over and pushing himself up, "There are a lot nicer ways to wake a guy up"

"Yeah well I don't know any" I replied and smacked him lightly on the cheek. "So get your ass up for patrol"

We headed out into the cold Philly air and walked down the street towards the south gate. When we got there Jimmy was already settled in against the fence and waiting for us.

"You two are late"

"Only twenty minutes, PL"

"Yeah well you aren't the one who got an ear full from Captain Ass Hat when I got here to relieve them"

"Sorry"

"Yeah buy me a drink later and I might forgive you" he smirked wickedly.

"It's a deal"

"Hey" Jimmy said quietly and rose from his spot to come over to us. He got close, his eyes darting around as if he expected someone to be listening in.

"Just spit it out PL" Carter rolled his eyes at me, expecting it to be some nonsense.

"Listen i'm not so sure about this mission"

"What do you mean?" I asked, glancing to see Carter's reaction but he almost seemed amused by Jimmy's comment.

"I mean, it doesn't really make sense for them to be sending us out on a mission does it?" he replied, rubbing his hands together nervously and glancing around again.

"So? What's wrong with that?" Carter shrugged, "It's perfectly normal"

"I mean we're fresh off the farm? Yet they're trusting us with a mission to take out supposed rebel forces?" his voice was almost squeaky as he tried to keep it amongst our small circle despite our locations remote isolation from the rest of the city...and people...

"Carter..."

"Ah don't tell me you're listening to him?" Carter shook his head at me and rolled his eyes.

"Well...he has a point"

"Thank you, Skylar" Jimmy smugly looked at Carter.

"I swear to god PL, if you start talking conspiracy theories-"

"Well what if these so called rebels are what's left over of the U.S Government and Monroe is killing them-"

"Jimmy don't say another word to me" Carter held up his hand, glaring at him sternly, "If they heard you talking like this they'd flog you. Maybe even kill you"

"Well you aren't going to report me are you"

Carter glanced at me for a split second before looking back at Jimmy, "No PL, i'm not"

"Okay go-"

"Only if you promise you'll stop talking about this" Carter interrupted, "I can't protect you if you get in trouble for it. It's treason"

"Fine but-"

"No, Jimmy...No buts, no nothing"

Jimmy closed his gapping mouth then walked back to his spot by the fence and settled in again.

I looked back at Carter, watching him intently. "Was that necessary?"

"I'm serious, Skylar"

"He has-"

"No, don't you start on this" he shook his head, "My father isn't a forgiving man, Skylar. He sees what he wants to see, and if you and Jimmy go around questioning things..."

He paused for a moment and looked up, staring down the road just beyond the fence.

"The repercussions will be...cataclysmic"

"I don't even know what that means"

"Just don't ever mention it again" he sighed and glanced back at me in concern. "Promise?"

"Promise" I gave a small smile and nod. "So" I smiled even wider, "cataclysmic?"

"What?" he shrugged, "I read"

"Just interesting word choice is all"

"Why?"

"I never pegged you as the reading type"

"Yeah well, there's a lot you don't know about me, Jones"

"Care to share"

"How much time we got"

"Couple hours" I answered, still smiling.

"All right...but you first"

I slightly raised my eyebrows at him and shrugged, "Okay i'll play"

"Make it good Jones" he smirked.

We told each other as much things about ourselves as humanly possible.

Favorite color.

His is blue, mine is green.

Favorite book.

His is The Hobbit, mine is The Hunger Games.

Favorite weapon.

Carter's is his nine mil, mine _was_ my bow...but I was starting to get use to having a gun strapped at my side. We talked for the whole patrol duty...but not once did he mention the one thing I wanted to know about him. But I didn't try and bring it up...I had hoped he was eventually going to tell me, but it must be too painful for him whatever it was...

Carter woke me early the next morning, before even the sun had risen in the sky. Not that it mattered as I squinted up I could see no stars. A dark, thick head of clouds rolling over and threatening to bring yet more snow. We didn't wear our uniforms but had thrown on street clothes. Carter in jeans and a long, white cotton shirt a large navy jacket but kept on his black militia boots. I wore similar clothes since there wasn't much to chose from. A grey long sleeved shirt, a pair of dark washed skinny jeans, and brown leather boots.

We had to look as inconspicuous as possible on this mission which meant none of our usual large guns, but our smaller, more concealable ones. Carter stuck his in the back of his pants and covered the bulge with the tan jacket. I followed his lead and did the same, pulling on a black pea coat. We met with Jimmy, Jason and Fry at the stables to grab our horses. We were to leave through the west gate, the guards there knew we were coming and were to let us out without a word or inspection. Though I had known the others from training camp, I didn't know Jason despite already having been here almost four weeks now. He was quiet, and had that military look about him despite his age of only sixteen. He almost seemed older because of it. His face set in a hard stone like expression, he was about as tall as Carter and almost as muscular too. He had short, curly dark hair, and his skin much lighter than his fathers. And I couldn't even imagine what having Captain Neville as a father must be like. No wonder Jason's so quiet.

Carter took lead as we headed out for Harrisburg. It was dark, cold and I could feel the wind picking up. I looked to the dark sky, a storm was definitely coming now and we'd be caught in it. But Carter wasn't stupid, I could see he noticed too as I caught his eyes watching the clouds. The sun was rising somewhere behind those dark clouds now but it didn't do much for us but make our little parade move slightly faster along the trail of the woods. I pulled my horse up beside Carter's and threw him a worried glance.

"I know, but we have to keep riding" he said, automatically knowing I was worried about the storm.

"We'll be fine" he added when my worried glance was still holding firm. He smiled to reassure me, but the looming darkness above our heads countered it.

"I just hope it's not as bad as it looks" I told him, turning my eyes away from the sky and back on him again.

"Probably worse then it looks"

"Well that's very reassuring!" Jimmy called from behind us. I turned in my saddle and smiled back at him.

"Well let's hope it holds off until tonight," Carter turned to talk to all of us now. "We need to ride as much as we can before it gets dark"

With the road ahead of us more like a thick blanket of mud, Carter didn't want to push the horses too fast, afraid one would get injured and we'd have to shoot it to put it out of it's misery. Just making our journey longer than is necessary. In the late afternoon it started to snow, then by early evening it was practically a blizzard and we raced to find shelter. We came upon an abandoned farm, using a large, dulled red barn as our shelter. We tied the horses to posts since there were no stalls. Jason and Fry left in search of dry wood in the other small shed, and the house just to the left of the barn. When they got back with arms full of pieces of anything they could grab; legs of chairs, bed posts, broken drawers from dressers and cabinets. Carter got a fire going, sweeping away old dust and hay that lingered on the hard, cold stone floor. We all sat around it in silence as it illuminated a warm heat. Since half of us didn't really know each other, we sort of just stared at our own feet. None of us really wanting to strike up a conversation.

"We should get some sleep" Carter finally said after a long moment of the dead silence. He moved, leaning back against one of the wooden support beams of the barn that was close to the fire and shut his eyes. Jason pulled his pack from his horse and used it like a pillow, settling as close to the fire as any one of us would dare to. Fry did the same, lying opposite the fire of Jason and they fell asleep quickly. Or at least it seemed like they had. Jimmy settled against a wall, having packed a thin blanket with a bed roll. He stayed farthest from the fire for some reason and I didn't ask why. I didn't feel tired so I continued to sit at my spot by the fire, just diagonal to Carter. I kept the fire going late into the night, so the others could stay warm. I guess it hadn't even occurred to Carter to set up a watch rotation just in case. So I guess I just sort of took that over. I was holding one of the broken chair legs, poking at the crisp ashes beneath the fresh wood. Sparks flew high, some even popped sideways and landed on my body but they went out in a tiny flash. Like they had never landed on me in the first place. I listened to the horses as they shifted back and forth on their hooves, the clacking was small and light from their hooves but it was almost rhythmic as they shifted their weight from one side to the other. I felt a hand on my shoulder and looked up just as Carter was sitting down beside me.

"Hey"

"Hi"

"You didn't have to stay up, you know?" he whispered, his hand still gripping my shoulder. I turned and smiled, "I wasn't tired"

"You should try, we have a long ride ahead of us tomorrow"

His eyes were almost pleading with me, "Go on, I'll stay up"

"You sure?"

"Positive"

"Do you mind?" I asked gesturing to his shoulder. He smiled and nodded, "Go ahead"

"Thanks" I rested my head against his shoulder, closing my eyes tight as his hand slid across my back and down my side. He pulled me in close as I wrapped my arms around my knees, tucking them into my body and leaning against his.

"Goodnight, Jones"

"Night"

We made it in another three days, the snow having slowed us down a great deal. But finally we made it into Harrisburg. We were exhausted. Carter decided it would be better to wait till tomorrow before going on with the mission. We needed to be well rested and focused if we were going to see this through. Harrisburg was like a small version of Philly, only a lot less militia soldiers. There were maybe only two units in the area, small, made up of only ten or fifteen men. Our presence didn't startle them, they didn't seem to care as we made our way down the streets, emptied and desolate from the storm. Carter led us to a small Inn, a small boy of maybe nine and a girl of about twelve took our horses for us. I stared at the little girl...her hair an ashy blonde...Her face worn and tired...

"Skylar"

I whipped my head around and they were all staring at me. I ignored their scrutinizing stares and Carter's worried expression and brushed past them. They followed right behind as we headed inside the small building. We got three rooms, Jason and Fry sharing one, Jimmy and Carter sharing the other and one for myself.

My room was small and cold...The silence as I curled up in bed was unsettling. I was so used to hearing Carter's snores that now without them I felt uncomfortable in the empty room. I got out of bed, shuffling across the cold floor in nothing but my underwear and my grey shirt which hung just an inch above my mid thigh. I opened the door to my room quietly and looked out into the hall just in time to see Carter leaving his own room. I shuffled out and closed the door. The sound of it made him turn around and he stared at me blankly for a moment.

"Couldn't sleep either?" I finally broke the silence.

"Yeah" he smiled gently. "Jimmy snores so loudly I couldn't even think let alone fall asleep"

I had to stifle a laugh at the irony and he just gazed back, his head doing that slight curious tilt as he looked me over.

"Want some company then?" I asked hesitantly and nodded to my room.

"Yeah...yeah sure" he answered. He looked nervous as he walked towards me, I had been so focused on the way he anxiously twisted his fingers with the hem of his shirt that I hadn't realized he was right in front of me till his hand shifted from his shirt to the door knob.

There was that curious tilt again, "You okay?"

"Yeah" I smiled up at him and my hand found it's way to his as he pushed open the door and pulled me in after him. I softly closed it behind me and we just stood in the dark for a moment, my hand still clasped in his. I could feel my heart pounding as he suddenly started to move closer.

"I need to tell you something"

"All right" I whispered, biting my lip back as he was only inches from me.

"Back in Philly...that night I was drunk and I..."

"Kissed me"

"Yeah" he nodded, his voice wavering. "I need you to know...that even though I was really drunk..."

"_Really _drunk" I emphasized, my eyes moving over the dark outline of his lips. I held my breath when a hurt expression swept over him. I knew what was coming.

And I wanted him to say it.

"I wish I hadn't been drunk when I did it because...I meant it" he whispered. "I had wanted to do that for so long and I hate myself that I only got the courage to do so under the influence"

I could feel the tension in his fingers as he waited for me to reply. I let it linger for a moment, trying to hold back a unexpected smile as I stared up at him in the darkness. His face unreadable and his eyes too hidden by shadow to reveal anything.

"Well it's about time" I whispered then threw my arms around his neck and eased my mouth over his in one swift motion. His hands went straight to my hips, his fingers gripping at the hem of my tee before drifting underneath and over my back. His breath was a welcoming warmth, and there was a sweetness about how he tasted that I couldn't quite place. Our noses had bumped, forcing me to tilt my head to the side as we only parted for a second to catch our breath. My fingers glided up over the back of his neck and through his hair, my fingers dragging, trying to get a hold of him but couldn't quite find something good to hold onto. We stumbled back against the wall, his body pressing firmly against mine as our lips continued to push and pull with each others. Our hands still trying to find somewhere to hold on. With Carter's hips pressed right into mine, his hands started to drift downward. His fingers spreading out, gripping me just on the side...just beneath the thin waistband of my underwear...His fingers dug into my bare skin and I bit his upper lip by accident from the sudden touch. We stopped for a moment, his fingers still gripping me and mine still in his hair. His eyes were staring straight back into mine, our breathing heavy and twisting. He pressed his forehead to mine suddenly and closed his eyes. But I kept my eyes open, peering at the contours of his worn face in the darkness. My hands slid back around, landing over his chest before I reached up my right hand. I ran my fingers lightly across his cheek, then down over his lips which were soft against the tips of my fingers.

"I want you"

"I'm damaged goods"

"Then i'll take every broken piece" I whispered as he opened his eyes to look back at me. I smiled at him, hopefully he could see it. "And glue you back together"

His lips found their way back over mine softly. I gripped his shirt tightly, pulling away from him only to draw him towards the bed. We collapsed onto it with our arms around each other and our bodies pressed so tightly we had to tilt our heads back a little just so we could kiss.

Screw the mission.

Screw the militia.

Screw everything.

I didn't want to ever leave this bed.

But as his hand gripped my shirt again, about to pull it up, I suddenly became terrified. So I threw my hand down and stopped him.

"Are you okay?" he asked, pulling away so he could look down at me. His hand glided over my cheek, his thumb gently stroking back and forth. I loved when he did that.

"I...I uh..."

"Skylar" he smiled and sat up, pulling me with him and into his arms again. "We don't have to" he whispered in my ear and kissed my cheek.

"I'm sorry" I croaked out. I wanted to cry from embarrassment. I could feel the tears building in my eyes and I tried to blink them away. Carter's thumb continued to stroke my cheek as he tried to reassure me.

"Skylar you have nothing to be sorry about"

"But...but isn't that what you wanted?"

He suddenly ripped his hand away from my cheek. "How could you even..."

He didn't finish. I could barely see but I could easily tell, not only that but the anger and hurt was in his voice as he glared back at me.

"Skylar this wasn't about trying to _get with you"_

"I'm sorry-"

"Don't be sorry" he scolded.

"I've just never...I haven't felt..." I could barely think let alone get anything to come out as I started to sob.

_Why did I have to cry?_

_Why did I have to cry in front of him?_

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be so harsh"

I buried my face into his shirt, gripping the loose fabric where it buttoned down over his chest. I closed my eyes tight as he wrapped his arms around me again and pulled me into his lap. He leaned back against the head board of the bed with me cradled in his arms. He leaned forward sightly, I could feel his arm as it reached out to grab something and soon enough I felt the thick quilt cover both of us.

"Hey, it's all right...go on and sleep" he whispered soothingly, his lips brushing my forehead as I clung tighter to him.

I could already feel myself drifting off.

I guess I was more exhausted than I thought.

He whispered something in my ear.

What was it?

I missed it.

My mind was already drifting away.


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: FirstMissions&BrokenSky**

***Skylar Jones***

When I woke up I was no longer in Carter's arms. He had left during the night. I sat up and stared blankly at my hands in my lap.

_Was it a mistake then? Did he not mean any of it._

"Skylar?" someone knocked on the door. I quickly pulled on my jeans and opened it only slightly to see who it was.

"Jimmy..."

"Sorry to disappoint?" he commented curiously as he looked back at my apparent disappointment. I quickly drew a smile and shook my head. "No sorry...Are we heading out?"

"Yeah, Carter said to meet out front with the horses"

"Why? Where is he?"

"I don't know. Was gone when I got up, left me a note" he shrugged and headed back down the hall. I grabbed my jacket then ran after him, following him outside to grab the horses. Fry and Jason already there and waiting for us in front of the Inn. But Carter was no where to be seen.

"His horse was still in the barn" Jimmy said, now holding the reins to both his and Carter's horse.

"Did he say where he was going?" Jason asked.

"No"

For the first time I saw something more in Jason's face...it was worry.

"You knew Carter" I said to him, "before Somerville?"

"Yeah" he nodded, the worry disappearing from his face as he looked back at me. "We were close"

"How close?" Jimmy questioned.

"PL, shut up" I hissed and punched him in the shoulder.

"We were like brothers" Jason answered anyway.

"Didn't know you still cared"

I turned to see Carter standing a few feet away, just up the sidewalk from us. He was staring at Jason, probably not daring to look my way and I hoped he wouldn't.

"I said _we were_ didn't I?" Jason snapped and turned away from Carter.

"Come on" Carter nodded, "Its a few hours just outside the city"

"Outside?" Fry questioned. "I thought they was in the city?"

"No" Carter shook his head. "They're holding up in one of the old factories"

Jason and Fry mounted onto their horses. I didn't move as Carter walked past me to take the reins of his horse from Jimmy. Jimmy mounted, and Carter turned. He stared at me for a moment. His expression reminded me of the first time I saw him. That strange, contemplative glance. His eyes searching me up and down and not in that sick way Roland had, or even in a loving way now. His gaze was almost...methodical. Like he was searching for something in the way I stared back at him or in my posture. He must not have found it as he turned away from me without a word and mounted his horse in one giant leap. Swinging his leg over in a swift movement and kicking his horse forward. Jason and Fry followed, Jimmy lingered as I mounted my horse. I looked over at him and now he too was staring at me curiously.

"What?" I snapped, probably a bit harshly but he seemed to just brush off my tone.

"Nothing" he shook his head and kicked his horse onward, me following right behind.

We tied our horses down, about six miles from the factory. Carter didn't want to get too close, knowing the horses would give us away. He whipped out his gun, checked the barrel then cocked it and kept it at his side as he looked up at us.

"Remember, if we're going to do this right we have to know what we're getting into" he stared each one of them down with stern eyes, but still wouldn't meet mine.

"We scope it out first. Make sure the intel was correct" he continued, "Then we go in. No survivors"

His voice almost scared me, it was firm and emotionless as he spoke. What we were about to do. There was no room to get sentimental. We couldn't hesitate. Hesitating would mean a bullet to the head or a sword in the gut. When we came upon the factory we hung back, watching for any sign that they were still there...A flag.

A red, white and blue flag hung just inside, right in front of a window. We could easily see the colors against the dull, grey metallic building.

"Jason. Fry" Carter called in a hushed voice, "Go around, towards the back. Report back in fifteen minutes"

"Got it" Jason said and they were both on their way, staying farther back in the thick of the woods so they wouldn't be see. The three of us sat for a few moments before Carter looked back at Jimmy. "Think you could scope out the other side by yourself?"

"Yeah sure" Jimmy shrugged and took off in the other direction.

_Great. Now we were alone...and he's staring at me..._

"Are you ready for this" he asked.

"Yeah of course" I remarked rather coldly.

"It's just-" he hesitated slightly and scrunched his face a bit almost like he was in pain. "There's a big difference between shooting a foam target and shooting a person"

"I'll be fine" I snapped and turned away from him.

"If this is about last night..."

"No this is about me realizing what an idiot I am"

I turned to look back at him, his eyes met mine immediately and held for only a second before they darted down at the gun in his hand.

"Before you fell asleep last night I said something to you"

"I didn't hear it"

He gave a small nod, "I thought so"

"Carter"

His eyes met mine again. I would have taken a step toward him, but my feet wouldn't move.

"It doesn't matter" he answered, already knowing I was going to ask what he had said.

"What? What did you do to make you so distant from people...to make you want to die"

"There are some things people don't like to talk about"

"I think you need to" I found the courage to move a little closer, "I think you need to talk about it"

"You know what it's like, to lose the only people that mattered" he answered. His voice angry and harsh, snapping back at me like a whip over already cut skin.

"What was her name"

"_What._.." Carter's voice croaked, he stumbled back on his feet from being caught off guard by my comment.

"What was her name?" I repeated, "The girl you loved"

I searched his face for any sign that I was right but instead found it in his clenched fists. His hands going a ghostly pale as his nails dug into his palms. There was a still a clearly irritated tone in his voice but he answered me, his face plastered in a guilty revealing sadness.

"Hana" he said her name so quietly as he was clenching his teeth. He looked like he wanted to hit me, but he held it back. I wouldn't have cared if he did, I probably deserved it but I needed to know. If we were going to work together we couldn't be in the dark about each other...and I guess that included me.

"Chris" I said surprisingly calmly. "My friend's name was Chris O'Leary. I probably would have fallen in love with him. I probably would have eventually married him, and had kids and lived out my life with peace and love and no worry at all. But that didn't happen. He died in my arms and I can't go back to that day and change things as much as I want to"

My voice trailed off for a moment. I took a deep breath before continuing on, meeting his eyes once again. "So i'm taking what i've been given because it's all I can do...It's all either of us can do"

"I'm sorry"

"Don't be...I am, I'm sorry because you must have loved her a lot" I stepped closer, "to think you can't go on without her"

"She made me a better person...a little like you I guess"

"Well I don't know about that"

"I think you underestimate the effect you have on people...on me"

I couldn't help but laugh, "The effect?"

"Your strength is quite overwhelming"

"I'm not really that strong" I looked achingly down at my arms.

"That's not what I meant"

His eyes held a firm gaze, drifting over my body for a moment before lingering on my eyes again. "What-"

Gun shots rang out. They echoed through the woods, at first we both froze from confusion. Then whipped ourselves around towards the area they were coming from. I turned back around and looked at Carter. His eyes were wide and he started to run towards the sounds of gun fire. I sprinted after him, we ran to the back of the factory. Looking for any sign of Jason and Fry as we grew closer to the sound of the gun fire. And just as it had started it ended suddenly. Carter stopped running abruptly, I ran right into him and he grabbed my wrist to prevent himself from falling over.

"Sorry"

"Sh!" he hushed, but didn't let go of me. I reached my other hand out and gripped his arm. He glanced back at me and then loosened his grip, sliding his hand down so his fingers clasped in mine. He pulled me forward slowly, his gun drawn in his other hand. He kept me close to him, my free hand now moving back to pull out my own gun. Carter stopped suddenly again. This time I saw but what ever he stopped for I couldn't see.

"Carter-"

"Don't look Skylar"

"Cart-"

"Don't look!"

I pushed him out of the way and I looked...I shouldn't have looked. There was a body about ten yards away. That unruly blonde hair, id recognize it anywhere.

I stumbled backward and Carter caught me. I couldn't breathe.

_I can't breathe._

Carter turned me away from Jimmy and pulled me into him.

"Skylar you have to keep it together" he whispered, his eyes searching the woods around us. "We still have to find Fry and Jason"

I let myself cling to him for only a second before pulling away. I blinked away the tears as I kept my back to Jimmy's body.

"Skylar stay here" he whispered, stroking his fingers over my cheek. "I...I have to check"

I gave a small nod in understanding and he kissed my forehead softly before walking over to Jimmy's body. Soon enough I felt his hand on my back, I turned my head and he shook his. Jimmy was gone.

Carter took my hand again and pulled me towards the factory. We hung back behind a thick brush, watching as five men pushed Jason inside...Fry was holding a gun to his head. I gasped and Carter clasped his hand over my mouth. I buried my face into his shoulder as not to look at the scene before me.

_He had probably killed Jimmy. _

Carter watched until they disappeared behind the factory doors. "We have to go now"

"No" I shook my head frantically. "No, we can still do this"

"Skylar"

"Jason is in there! We can't just leave him to be tortured and Jimmy..."

I shut my eyes tight, fighting back the tears that would overwhelm me if I didn't stay strong like Carter claimed I was. Carter was being so calm, and here I was barely holding myself together as I tried not to cry. "They killed him Carter" I said angrily. "They have to _pay_ for it"

"All right" he nodded to my surprise and looked back towards the factory. "I have a plan"

"What do we do?"

"I've got a bomb"

"What? You just..._have a bomb?_"

"Well that was the plan right? Before..."

"Yeah I guess"

"Good. Let's go hunt us some rebels"

Carter rigged the bomb, to the opposite side of the factory from where they pulled Jason. I wasn't really sure how all of it worked but he said he fixed it so that it wouldn't be as big. We just needed a distraction large enough to draw them away, take em' out and rescue Jason at the same time.

"Will you be okay?" he asked me after coming back from setting the bomb. "To get Jason by yourself while I pick them off?"

"I'm more worried about you" I told him.

"I'll be fine" he smiled. "We meet back here if anything goes wrong"

I nodded and held his eyes for a moment. There it was again, that inspective stare he did when he looked at me.

"I'll see you soon" I said when he just continued to stare.

"Remember, don't go in until it goes off and...be careful"

"Yeah you too"

But I didn't move as I continued to watch him. Then giving in as I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him hard. He stumbled back and his eyes went wide for a moment before shutting tightly as he wrapped his arms around my waist and kissed me back. I pulled my lips away from his and whispered in his ear, "Just in case"

"Go on, i'll see you soon" he smiled once more. "Give em' hell, Jones"

I couldn't resist and kissed him swiftly one more time then made my way back towards the other side of the small factory. I didn't have to wait long before I heard the large BOOM of the explosion. I watched as fire and smoke rose above the hidden side of the factory.

_One...two...three...four...five...six...seven...eight...nine...ten. _

I sprinted towards the door the rebels had disappeared behind earlier. I pulled it open, looking in before moving into the building. My gun drawn in front of me, pointed forward as I slowly walked down a long hall. I heard shouting, but the echoes quickly diminished. They were running towards the explosion and towards Carter. I looked in every room, all empty until I peeked around a corner of the hall way. I saw a man with a gun, standing in front of a closed door. I hid behind the corner again...looking around the floor I picked up a small round metal object and tossed it so it hit the wall opposite me. I heard the rebel's boots as he hesitantly walked down the hall. I stayed flat against the wall, I stuck my gun in the back of my pants and pulled out the knife from my boot. I couldn't use the gun, someone would hear it and come running. As I heard him get closer, I came out, low to the ground as I swung my foot and knocked the soldier over onto his back. He had dropped his gun and before he could scream I rammed my knife into his throat. Blood flowed heavily from his neck, some of which splattered my face as I dug the knife deeper, watching his eyes go wide then roll back as his thrashing seised.

"That's for Jimmy you piece of rebel shit" I whispered then pulled my knife from his throat when his eyes rolled back. I wiped the blood from my face on my sleeve then stuck my knife back in my boot and picked up his gun. I ran towards the door the rebel was guarding and opened it slowly. Peeking in I saw Jason tied to a chair. His eyes were closed and he was already beaten bloody. There were no other guards so I ran in and used the knife to cut his hands and feet loose.

"Jason! Jason come on! Wake up!" I smacked him hard across the face and his eyes shot open. He grimaced then turned and glimpsed through painfully partially squinting eyes up at me.

"There are nicer ways to wake a guy you know"

I smiled, "I see why Carter likes you"

I helped him up, but he insisted that he was fine. I handed him the rebel's gun then pulled out my own again.

"Where's Carter?" he asked quietly.

"He was the distraction"

"Well, let's go save his ass then"

We headed through the factory, as we moved further and further we could hear the sound of guns shots again. Then there was silence.

We moved faster, running now as we turned a corner to see Carter beating on Fry. Carter's fists smashing in his already swollen and enormously bloody face. I ran past several unrecognizable bodies, the faces messed up from the bullets that had pierced their foreheads and the blood smearing all over like a thick red mask...and I smiled.

I grabbed Carter, he hadn't stopped even when I had gotten close and yelled his name. I pulled him off Fry and pushed him away. Carter was breathing heavily and he had tears running down his dirt and blood caked face. Carter leaned against the wall to catch his breath, glaring in deep hatred down at Fry. I turned to him, he was laughing. Blood spewing from his mouth. He was missing several teeth and his face was barely recognizable like the dead rebels around us. I held my gun up, aiming right between Fry's eyes.

"Shut the hell up!"

He just smiled up at me viciously for a second and then kept laughing, louder now. Almost manically so and it scared me.

"Shut up!" I yelled again, taking a step closer with my gun still trained on him.

But he didn't stop.

So I pulled the trigger.


End file.
